Secrets and all that comes along - Brittana
by Mayah Enchanted
Summary: Brittany has a secret that is currently getting on the way of her relationship with Santana. Will Santana find it out in time to help her or is it too late and this is now Brittany's death sentence? - Summary sucks. Give it a try ok? I'll try my best not to let you down.
1. Pilot - Make out Sessions

**A/ N - So, this is an idea tha has been on my mind for a very long time now. **

**I hope you guys like it. **

**I own nothing but the plot itself on this story. Everyone knows that right? **

**English is not my first language, so, any mistakes on this matter, please, forgive me and let me know. **

**I have this whole story writen on my notebook, the problem is: Typing it and re-reading it. **

**I get bored to death to type things and re-read what I wrote is just as painfull as a punch in the stomach. **

**(For whatever that means, I've never been punched. Fuck yeah! haha)**

**Anyways, that could be a problem, but I promise, I'll try to work through it and get this updated as soon as possible. **

**I'll make no promises on such a thing as daily updates ok? When I say soon, I'm talking about weekly. Alright?**

**For what matters, this chapter is something like semi-smut (Does that even exist?! I don't know. I'm not sure. What? Anyway... ) so, you have been warned.**

**Keep going on your risk. But don't worry, it's not like it's a porn chapter. **

**Anyway, go ahead and have fun.**

* * *

It had been two weeks since the girls' last make out session.

With this in her mind, Santana invited Brittany over, since they got out of school earlier that tuesday.

Not long after, they were both in Santana's bedroom as Santana rushed over and started to press hard and hungry kisses all over the neck of the blonde, who also didn't wasted much time on granting the latina as much of space on her neck as she could, enjoying every little kiss.

Soon, Brittany was being pushed down on the bed, as she lay on her back, Santana lost no time and got on top of her.

- Hey… Where… Where's your mom anyway? Isn't… Isn't her car in front… of your house? – Brittany manages to say between kisses.

- My mom's down the street at her friend's house on a book meeting… For whatever that means. – She leans down and kisses her again and then, breaks apart only to complete her sentence. – She won't be home anytime soon, though. Now, where were we? – She says as she lean down and plant more kisses on the blonde.

Things were heating up each second. Their hands were traveling all over each other's body.

Santana reached for Brittany's shirt and started to pull it out.

She couldn't control the disappointing look and the fast pout that showed on her face when she felt her hands being stopped by Brittany's.

- What? – She asked confused.

- No boobs showing today. – Brittany said calmly.

- What? Britt! Why not?

Fast enough, Brittany put on her best puppy look, and staring the latina with beautiful blue eyes, she softly said:

- Because, this morning one of them was running a fever. I don't think they're feeling ok. You know? I think they're getting sick.

- What? Oh… My… God! Brittany… - She looked at the blond in disbelief.

- What? – She asked still looking at Santana with puppy eyes. As soon as the latina didn't respond her, she turned into sexy eyes again and full of lust, she continued. – What? Don't you want me anymore? – She bucked her body under Santana's.

-Oh.. I want you… I do. – Santana rushed to kiss the blonde again as their hands went, once more, wide and free all over each other's body.

Things were heating up again as Santana left Brittany's mouth and started to kiss her neck and suck on her pulsing point.

One move and her own shirt was off to the floor, and of course Brittany, in no more than one heartbeat, was cupping the lastina's breasts over her bra. Moving softly and fast at the same time, she had both hands on the task of taking Santana's bra off. This time, was her turn to be disappointed. She open her eyes to look as Santana was staring down at her eyes with a smirk on her face. She had being stopped on the task and she had no idea why.

-No boobs showing today. – Santana soon said almost giggling to herself. Soon, Brittany's eyes were back to the puppy form.

- What? No! I meant mines, San. My boobs were not to be showed today. I said nothing about yours. I love your boobs and they're not sick… They can show up normally today.

- What? Hell to the no. I have to show my boobs and you don't? Not fair Britt. – She said with a little roughness on her voice, though she didn't intend to.

She didn't count on what was coming next. Brittany 's eyes were now filled with tears.

- Ok. I don't to do this anymore. I wanna go home. – Brittany says already pushing Santana down. The girl ends up landing on the space between Brittany's legs.

"Ahhh… Sometimes I think I'm dating a child.

And sometimes, I'm pretty sure. Like really sure.

What the hell? She's going to cry because of what I said?

Seriously! On moments like this, I am one hundred per cent sure: I AM dating one big ass CHILD!"

Santana was forced to snap out of her thoughts when she realized that Brittany was about to get off the bed.

- No, wait... Britt… Wait. – She held her down.

- What?

- Stay. Ok? Let's finish what we've started.

- I don't – Santana interrupted her.

-No. Stay Britt-Britt. I'll even let you play with them… - She lifts her breast as a smirk spreads on her face.

- No. I wanna go home now.

- What? Britt. It's alright. I'll let my boobs show up. C'mom… It was just a joke, although, I really would like to see yours. Anyway, C'mom... Lay back down and we'll finish this ok? There. – She said as she unhooked her own bra letting it slide off her body and fall to the bed. – They're out Britt. Now, come here. – She pushed the blonde down on the bed again and loses no time on getting on with the kisses again.

After a few moments, she notices Brittany isn't actually doing anything. She's not kissing, nor rubbing the latina, nor squeezing her breasts... Nothing! She's laying there under her doing absolutely nothing.

- Britt, what's going on? You're not doing anything.

- It's just… I really wanna go home now. – She said with a little sadness on her voice.

- What? Britt… I was just kidding ok? It's alright. It was joke.

- It's not that San… It's just… - She sighs as her eyes are filling with tears again. – Can we just stop? I really want to go home now.

- Fine. Go home. – Santana says as a little angry and a little hurt shows up on her voice. She falls by Brittany side leaving the blonde free to go.

Quickly, Brittany pick up her bag and stands by the door frame staring down at Santana, who now, have her right arm covering her face as her left one covers her breast.

After a moment, Santana notices Brittany is still there.

- What? – She asks taking her arm off her face to look at Brittany.

- I can't go home alone, you know?

- Why not? – She asks not quite remembering why, considering the girl lives just a couple of blocks away.

- I have no idea how to get there.

Santana sighs again. She remembered now she was dealing with Brittany. Of course she had no idea how to go home from there.

Even though she was mad at the girl, she still loved her. Of course she would take her home.

- I'll drive you there. Just give me a minute.

- It's fine. Can you just call my mom please? My phone went dead.

- Britt, seriously. One second. I'll drive you there. – She said getting up and putting her clothes back on.

- Thank you. But, no, thanks. You're mad at me. Why do you still want to drive me home?

- It's fine Britt. Come on.

They went downstairs, as Santana grabbed her mother's car keys and soon, Brittany started to talk again.

- I don't get it.

- What? – Santana asked confused.

- You're mad at me and yet, you're driving me home.

- I told you. It's fine… Let's go. – She replied.

- You keep saying it's fine and everything Is ok, but you're not really denying that you're mad at me. – She pouts a little.

- That's because I am mad at you. – She stopped and turned around to look at the girl. – Now get your ass inside the car and let's get going. Ok?

- hummm… I think it would be for the best if you just call my mom. I'm sure it wouldn't be a problem. She can pick me up. – Soon the girls sweet pout turns into a sad pout. Almost like she's about to burst into tears.

- You know what? I am the one who doesn't get it, Brittany. What the hell happened in there? Everything was going just fine and then, because of a joke your mood just made a 180° flip and now you keep acting like I did something terribly wrong and I have… I have no idea what you want. Ok? I said I was sorry. I did what you asked and yet, here we are. You keep acting like it's my fault. Did I do something wrong? Because If I did, I'm sorry, I didn't notice.

- No. It's not…

- Did I say something wrong? – Santana cut her off almost shouting at her.

- No. You didn't do anything wrong.

- Then, what is it? Tell me! What's wrong? – She said softly looking into Brittany's eyes as her own was now filling with tears.

- I – I can't talk about it. Alright? I'm sorry. – Brittany looked at the floor under her now and soon, Santana's tears dried back and she went back to her tough self.

- Yeah… I get it. Let's get you home now. Shall we?

Santana drove them over to Brittany's house and pulled over by the sidewalk of Brittany's front door closing her eyes never really looking at the girl.

For her surprise, she never heard the door of the car open. So she knew Brittany hadn't move. She opened her eyes and looked at the girl finding her staring right at her.

- Are you still mad at me? – Brittany asked shyly looking at Santana now, searching for a reassuring look or a smile or something to let her know everything was fine. She found no signs of such a thing.

- No. – She replied coldly. – Now go home.

- You say no, but I think your brain is desperately trying to shout "YES" for this question. Be honest with me, are you still really mad? Cos I don't like when you're mad at me. I like when we're fine. You know? Everything cool… So, again, Are you still mad at me?

- Alright, you want honesty? Yes. I'm mad and actually, a little hurt too. – Santana let out a sigh that immediately gave away her frustration. – I am hot as hell. You know? I am so freaking hot I could've slept with the entire school and…

- You practically have. – Brittany cut her off as she said this calmly.

- Well, that's not the point. – She said. – The point is, I was there with you when I could be with anyone else. I showed you my boobs although you didn't show yours. You had me there only for and you couldn't care less. That's kinda… It hurts a little, you know? – She says the last part almost in a whisper.

- I am sorry. I didn't – I didn't mean to hurt you like this. I – I just… - She wanted to tell Santana. She did, for real. But she couldn't. She just couldn't. – San, I don't want to talk about this anymore, but please, believe me, I have good reasons. And, you are hot. You are, in fact, the hottest person I know. But, it's something that has been on my mind and I'm trying to just shrug it off. Ok? Just give me some time and I promise, we'll be ok in no time. Now, can you please trust me and not be mad at me anymore?

- Ok. Are you sure you don't want to talk about it?

- Yes.

- Hummm… Ok then. – She kisses Brittany's cheek as she rubs the other with her thumb.

- Do you want to come in?

- No. My mom doesn't even know I'm here. She'll kill me if she gets home and I'm not there.

- But you said she wasn't gonna be home any time soon.

- I know. But I can't risk it.

- Right. See you tomorrow then.

- Sure. Bye.

* * *

**So, how was it? Any good at all? Please, leave a review telling me how you feel about it. **

**Should I keep going or do I stop right here? **

**Have a nice day/Night!**

**(Wherever you are, have a good time!) **

**See you next time.**

** (Or not, it's up to you all)**


	2. Something is wrong

**A/R **

**GUEST 1: Thank you. I promise I'll work on this.**

**WWTGGD: Sorry. I promise I'll work on this. And thank you! Update, there you go. **

**GUEST 2: Sorry. I'll work on this. And to what you said, Santana didn't say it. It was just something that crossed her mind and we'll see more about the regret part for even having the thought about this childish behavior of Brittany. I promise, Santana isn't "annoyed" by it. It's actually something she loves about Brittany. About characterization. Sorry, I can't stick too much on the original characters, otherwise, most of this story wouldn't happen at all. Some things on their personalities might be just slightly different. But, apples and trees, right? It won't fall too far. I promise. But I'll work on how she reacts to this. And to the rest, thank you.**

**GUEST 3: Thank you. **

**JULZY04: Thank you! Well, here we are. I'll continue it. Promise. **

**STEPHANIIEC: Thank you! We'll get there. hahahaha Update, there you go.**

**A/N I see this first chapter got everyone really confused. I promise I'll work on this and I'll fix this first chapter as soon as I have time and courage! (Honestly, the second part is something I really have a lack of!)**

**Thank you all for the honesty. I appreciate. As for the quotation marks, I apologize and I'm working on it. I'm posting this chapter. Please, tell me if it's any good at all. **

**Stick to this and help me out. It might turn into a good thing. **

**Just so everyone knows: Quotation marks is for dialogue, and quotation marks and bold letters are for thoughts! Ok? **

**Now, go ahead for this next chapter and have fun.**

* * *

The next morning, they both went to school normally.

Santana walked her way to the lockers and found Brittany digging through her own locker.

"Hey Britt-Britt." Santana greeted the girl.

"Hi." Brittany said simply as she slammed her locker's door shut.

"Feeling better today?" Santana asked as she opened her own locker to get her books for the day.

"Yeah… hum… I gotta go…" She answered awkwardly.

"What?"

"Class! I – I have… hum… Class! See ya!" Brittany stuttered out her sentence as she ran off without giving Santana the chance to reply.

Santana just stood there, confused and kinda hurt. She didn't see that coming. She just greeted her. Did she say something wrong? Wait! Did Brittany just lied to her?

Soon enough, Santana got lost on the amount of thoughts running through her mind.

"**Great sign of a lie when it comes to Brittany: She stutters. **

**Thank Goodness. Britt makes a terrible liar. **

**What's going on with her? Is she avoiding me or am I crazy?**

**Nah… I'm pretty sure she just wanted to grab her stuff and run like a mile away from me.**

**What did I do? Maybe I wondered out loud about the child thing. **

**Ohh crap Santana. You just made your girlfriend and best friend, for that matter, mad at you!**

**Yaaaaay! Congrats. Brittany is the sweetest person in the whole Earth and you manage to make her mad at you. Seriously! What is wrong with you? **

**You're such a bitch! It's getting on your way Santana. Watch it. **

**Ohh… Snap out of it Santana. Get your shit together and go see what's wrong with her. **

**She's sweet. She'll tell you. **

**Apologize, kiss her – secretly, though. Be careful. – and then, move on. **

**And make sure you don't ever make that mistake again. Dumbass!**

**If you don't make any mistakes like this, you shall be fine. Go ahead. Take care of your girl."**

Santana closed her locker's door and walked down the hall to her math class, although, she was a bit early for it.

She walked in and found Brittany on the same spot as always: by the wall on the side of the window.

Santana smiled a little thinking how adorable it was to see Brittany entertained by such little things. Like one pair of birds outside the window she was looking.

She giggled as the birds seemed to be playing outside and soon, she looked away from it, as the birds flowed away. She, then, noticed Santana standing by the door frame. She couldn't help but feel a little uncomfortable as Santana walked her way to stand right in front of her.

"Britt… What's going on with you? You've been acting weird on me and…"

"I'm not."

"Yes, you are. Britt-Britt… Is it about last night? I said I was sorry and I mean it. It was just a joke. And I – I was… hum… I was wondering if you… Well if I said anything out loud and…"

"Like what?"

"Well, anything. I was just wondering if I said something wrong and you're mad at me. "

"Santana, I told you. I'm not mad nor am I acting weird, for that matter as well. Everything is ok."

"Then… Why did you run off on me like that?"

"I told you. I had class." – She said simply.

"Well, Britt. So did I. Did you forget again we have classes together?" – She said amused with a smile on her face only to try and cheer up her girlfriend.

"No. It's just that – that I… hum… I didn't want to be late." – She said stuttering again.

"You do realize you're like 20 minutes early, right?"

"Well, better early than late." – She replied.

"Britt, you're shutting me out. What's wrong? Tell me. Please. I don't like when I get this feeling something is up and you keep insisting on not telling me. I feel useless for not being able to help you. Please, tell me." – The girl said with tears threatening to break on her voice.

"I am not. I'm not shutting you out. Nothing is wrong, San. Don't worry. You did nothing wrong."

Brittany couldn't help but jump when the loud noise of the book hitting her table filled the air.

The book came crashing against the hard wood of the table.

"You forgot your book." – She turned around to leave the classroom, leaving a very confused Brittany behind.

"No. San… Come on. No. Come back here. I don't like it when you're mad at me. Please."

Santana continued to walk away even though Brittany begged her not to.

She walked out of class only to met Quinn on her way.

"Hey Quinn."

"Hey." The girl answered smiling. They walk down the hall to Quinn's locker. "What's up?"

"Can I tell you something? But only cos I'm about to explode?"

"HA. Sure! What's up?"

The girl giggles a little. Would be a strange conversation if Santana talked to her on a moment she wasn't on the edge of explosion. It had always been like this. Never changes. Not even a little bit. Ever since they met on freshman year, it has been like this. Yet, there they are. Best friends. And Quinn can't help but think she wouldn't change a thing about her friendship with Santana.

"So, I think Britt hates me."

"What?"

"I don't know. She's shutting me out. She won't tell me anything, but I'm sure, something is up with her. And it might or it might not have something to do with me thinking how childish she is. I just… I love her childlike behave. Honestly, I do. It was just something that crossed my mind. And I even said I was sorry. It was just one thought and feel bad about it. And did I mention I said I was sorry." – Santana pouts a little.

"Wait" – Quinn cut her off. – "Did you say you were 'thinking' about how childlike Brittany is?"

"Yes."

"Then, how the hell is she supposed to know that you were thinking about this?"

"I don't know… I wasn't really paying attention to it. I was frustrated because she wouldn't…" – She cut herself off. "Never mind. I uh… I forgot something on my locker. See you in math class." She said already walking away from Quinn.

"But…" Too late. The latina was long gone when Quinn tried to say something. She sighs and looks back to her locker picking up the rest of her books.

Santana walked her way to her locker, just in case Quinn decided to check on her. She couldn't risk Quinn asking questions about her unfinished sentence and her little lie.

"**Better watch it Lopez. You almost slipped it out.**

**You must be having some serious thing going on with you this week.**

**What is it? A tumor? **

**Seriously. Watch yourself better.**

**You hurt Brittany, and then you almost slip your secret to Quinn… What's next? You're going to sleep-tell your mother about this?**

**Watch it Santana. Watch it!"**

Again she was forced out of her thoughts when the bell rang indicating it was time for class. She walked back in and noticed Brittany had changed her spot this time. She was now sitting with Rachel, as Quinn wasn't there yet and Finn had a different schedule.

Santana walked in only one minute before the teacher and took a seat where Brittany and she always did.

She looked back to where Rachel was sitting with Brittany and looked back to her hands on her lap. Not much later, the teacher walked in and so did Quinn.

"Sitting alone today?"

"I told you. She hates me."

"Move. I get to sit by hall. I hate to sit by the window. The sun always hit on my book and I quite can't read it. I hate it."

"You're gonna sit with me?"

"Well… Yeah, unless you don't want me to. In this case, I'll just walk away with a broken heart and an excruciating pain from being dumped by my friend when I was just trying to be nice and…"

"Alright everybody. Take your seats and settle down." – The teacher said clapping her hands.

"Come on… Move." Quinn said smiling.

"You are such a drama Queen. Excruciating pain? Really?" Santana said giggling and moving to the chair next to her, thankful she didn't have to be alone.

Class went normal, except for Santana that earned a few call outs from the teacher for looking back way too much. Barely had she known what she was looking at.

The bell went off again and math class was over. Santana and Quinn gathered their stuff and put it on the cheerio's locker seeing as the next class was cheerio's practice.

"Ready for torture?" Quinn asked giggling.

"Always." Santana responded. "You?"

"Let's run it."

They both walk into the field, but unfortunately, their positions put them a little far away from each other. But, on the bright side, it put Brittany right next to Santana. It granted her one more chance to talk.

"Britt…" – She whispered as the other girl looked her way. "Britt. I'm mad at you. Seriously. I am officially mad at you. What's going on?"

"I've told you one hundred times San… Nothing is wrong. And I have also told you that I really don't like it when you're mad at me."

"Yeah. I know… But you're not helping much on this. You are shutting me out. You've been acting weird and you've been avoiding me. Please, talk to me, cos, seriously, you're hurting me and I don't like it."

"I'm sorry. I really am. It's just… I – I'm in… I'm in those huh… Those red days. You know?" She said nervously.

"Red days?" Santana raises an eyebrow . "You mean your period?" She nods. "And what exactly does your period have to do with this?"

"I'm experiencing some mood swings and all…"

"Ohh really?" Santana said feeling her cheeks burn with anger. Why was Brittany lying to her? What was so wrong with her she wouldn't tell her best friend and girlfriend? "Red days. And last night?" She asked.

"Part of the deal."

"Ohh cut the crap Brittany. You're lying. And thank God, you make a terrible liar. Now tell me what's really-"

She was cut off mid-sentence by coach Silvester.

" Come on girls. Positions now!" – She yelled.

"Tell me Britt!"

"Can't. We gotta go now." She said on the most adorable tone ever.

"Fine. But we'll finish this later on glee club."

"Ok. I'll see you there." She walked back to her position, only two or three steps away from the latina.

"**Seriously. I am officially about to explode. **

**Brittany is gonna end up being my doom.**

**She is so adorable in every single way. What am I gonna do with all this cuteness?**

**And what am I gonna do with this hurt feeling of being shut down?**

**I just want to help her. I just want to be ok with her. I just… **

**Ahhh snap out of this. Again: Get your shit together Santana.**

**You love her, but back off. Give her some space. She could use some.**

**You'll still love her even if you don't get to be around her 24/7.**

**Just pull yourself together. Maybe it's nothing. Get on with the game."**

She was pulled out of her thoughts when she felt someone nudge her arm.

"Santana!" Quinn exclaimed.

"Wait… Huh? What?"

"Care to share where your mind were lost, sand bags?" – Sue said approaching the girl.

"Sorry, coach. It won't happen again. I promise."

"Of course it won't. Cos if it does, whatever you're thinking about will soon slip out of your mind when I pop up these sand bags you claim to be your boobs. Got it?" – She asked yelling.

"Yes coach." She answered angrily.

"Now, 2 laps around the field when we're done with practice."

"What? That's just…"

"3 laps" – Sue said sarcastically.

"But I"

"4 laps"

She was about to yell something else, but her voice was muffed by Quinn's hand.

"Shut up. She'll give you 20 as well as a whole mile and a marathon if she has to. Shut up. Ok?"

She nods.

"Want some more Lopez?"

She shook her head.

"Good. Now come on… Get this thing going girls."

The practice was now finished, earlier than usual, so Santana would have enough time to get her four laps around the field done as Sue had told her to.

"**I hate this. I hate this. I hate this. I hate this."**

It was all that crossed Santana's mind now. Everything else had just slipped out of her mind.

* * *

**A/N So, how was it? Any good at all? I hope so.**

**Just wanted to make it clear: I won't break Brittana, Ok? I'm not that mean. Haha**

**But I'll bend them a little. (Just a little, tiny, tiny bit. Ok?) Just hang on. We'll be ok in the end. I promise. **

**I received a PM asking about how romantic this is gonna be and if there will be some smut chapters and more sweet lady kisses further. **

**So, dear reader, it won't be much romantic.**

**The reason why I haven't classified this story as romance is because it's not a romance. **

**You'll get to see a lot of Brittana in this, but don't expect it to be a romantic story, cos it's not.**

**If that's what you waiting for, I assume I'll end up letting you down. Sorry.**

**Anyway, thank you guys for everything. Please, let me know how you feel. **

**See y'all soon! **


	3. It can't be! Can it?

**chibimaritza****: Yep. Something really big is up, you'll soon find out. Thank you! **

**So, except for my friend, no one else would like to review? No? Ok! **

**It's ok, tho. I'll keep going anyway. **

**Thank you guys for all the follows and favorites! **

**Hope you guys enjoy this one.**

**Go ahead, have fun!**

* * *

After running for what felt like 12 hours, Santana hit the showers after getting a warning speech from Sue.

She expected to see no one else in the showers, but for her surprise, Quinn was still there.

"What are you still doing here?" – She asked as she drank some water from her bottle.

"Waiting for you, of course!" – Quinn answered simply and smiling.

"Why?"

"Well, because you almost got yourself killed by one Sue Silvester. I just wanted to check if you are... I don't know, suicidal?"

"What? You're out-"

Quinn cut her off.

"No. Seriously, Santana. What's up with you? Do you want to talk about it? Something you need help with?"

"No. I don't need anything. And I told you, I think Brittany hates me. That's all."

"And since when does someone hating on you makes you get on the way of coach Silvester? Since when does someone hating on you makes you so out of your mind like this?"

"**SINCE IT IS BRITTANY THE ONE HATING ON ME!"** – She thought loudly to herself, fighting the urge of letting the words come out. But she knew, she couldn't tell anyone. Or maybe, she could, but she was way too coward to do so. So, instead of saying what she desperately wanted to say, she remained silence for a moment and soon, got herself to respond to Quinn.

"Since never. I am not out of my mind. I'm just tired and I got distracted for a second. Is that a crime? Sue is a pain in the ass, that's all. Now, get going. I need a shower. I think I might have lost 10 pounds on that field. I'm dying."

Quinn smiled.

"I can only imagine." – She said as she walked out of the cheerios' locker room.

Santana stood still for a moment, loosing track of where her thoughts were leading her.

She had to hold on to all the strength she still had on herself to fight the urge of sitting on the floor holding her knees to herself and rock herself back and forth as well as hold back the tears that threatened to fall down.

After something like five minutes or so, she got herself to actually take a shower.

The hot water running down through the latina's body sent her straight to where her mind was trying to avoid to go: Brittany.

Santana was known as a very good observer. She would sense something wrong with people from miles away and normally, she didn't even have to ask to actually know what was wrong.

Now, when it came to Brittany, everything was just so weird and hard and it felt like she was drifting on thin ice in the middle of a haze.

She had no idea what do to. She felt like any move could just break the thin ice and make her fall on the gelid water.

The thoughts hunting her mind were just too much and too painful. Not being able to hold back any longer, the first tear came streaming down her face burning its way down. And then, another tear came down, and then another, and another… Not long after this, she was a mess of sobs.

There was no point on holding back the tears, since no one was around, so she just let it hit her and take its own course off of her. She needed to let it all out, so she did.

After something around 10 minutes, no more tears were coming down, so Santana decided it was time for her to get out of the shower and get herself ready for the next class.

She walked in on Biology class, this time, Brittany was sitting with Mike.

Tina had a different schedule, along with Mercedes, Kurt and Blaine.

Again, the disappointed look on Santana's face was out of her control. She felt tears burning on the back of her eyes threatening to fall again.

Brittany and she were together since primary school and they had never been apart ever since. How come that, out of a one night misunderstanding, they are now sitting on completely different extremities of the very same classroom?

Santana remained still, unable to move until she felt someone dragging her away from the entrance to a spot next to where Rachel and Finn were sitting.

"Santana, what the hell is wrong with you? If you keep going off your mind like that in middle of all classes, you'll end up getting suspended. What's wrong with you?" Quinn asked worried.

"Huh?"

"You were just standing by the door looking at God knows where while the teacher threatened to kick you out of his class. Please, tell me what's wrong. I'm starting to worry about you."

"There's nothing wrong Q. Don't worry. And… Well uh… Thanks… You know… For- For looking out for me today. Thanks."

"No need to thank me. Just watch out next classes and, whatever it is that's bothering you, get rid of it or get better, ok?" Quinn said and offered a smile. Her arms passing around the other girl's shoulders as she gently rubbed her arm. "Now, help me out here. Will you?"

"Sure." She giggled.

After biology class, Quinn and Santana had a different schedule from each other.

"Are you sure you're gonna be ok Santana?" Quinn asked worried.

"Yes. I am sure. Don't worry. I'll be fine. Now go. You're gonna be late."

"Ok, bye. See you afterwards, yeah?"

"Sure."

Santana walked her way to her Spanish class as Quinn walked for Chemistry class.

As soon as she walked into class, she didn't saw Brittany in it, but considering she was one of the first ones to enter the classroom, it was understandable. She didn't keep her eyes looking for the blonde though; she just wanted this day to be over.

Santana wasn't expecting to have company at this class, since she would be alone on the other before that if it wasn't for Quinn. This time, without Quinn, she was expecting to be alone.

Once again, she was caught by surprise when she noticed someone sitting on the chair by her side.

"What are you doing?"

"Taking a seat!"

"Why?"

"Because you're alone and it sucks to be alone on Spanish class."

"Oh Is that so?"

"Yep."

"And you're not at all here to get some help with the assignment?"

"Of course not, you're a friend. I'm keeping you company."

"Get the hell out of my face Puckerman."

"But-"

"Out!" She cut him off yelling at him. "I'd rather be alone than have you as company."

"You're such a bitch. You know that right?"

"Do you like to have balls? Cos you won't have any if you keep sitting here. Now get up and walk away before I rip off your balls, mash them like potatoes and shove them down your throat."

"Ouch!" He whispers as he slowly stands up and start walking away.

Santana's eyes go back back to her hands and soon, she's looking out the window.

Again, she notices someone sitting down on the chair next to her and without turning around, she starts saying:

"Puckerman, I swear, if you don't take your lame ass off this chair to somewhere else, so help me God. Cos, I'll rip this mohawk off your head by the same time I'll rip off your balls. Now get out before I go all Lima Hei-" She cuts herself off when she turns around to face the last person she was expecting to see.

"I'm not Puckerman, though."

"What are you doing here?"

"You seemed sad. I thought I could keep you some company!"

"You have got to be kidding me frankenteen."

"Yeah… Yeah… Yeah… We're all kidding you today Santana. None of us really care to notice Brittany is sitting with anyone but you during classes today. Did you guys had a fight? Cos I don't think I have lived enough to actually see you guys fighting till now. What happened?"

Finn said as he looked deep into her eyes. Not long after, Santana noticed a sparkle into Finn's eyes. **"Maybe he truly cares!"** She thought quickly.

"Yeah… Like I would tell you. Get lost Finnocence. You're disturbing me."

"Well… Deal with it. I'm staying."

"I swear I'll go –" Finn cut her off mid-sentence.

"All Lima Heights on me. Yeah… Yeah… Bring it. I'll stay. You put up this tough face, but I can see it in your eyes that you don't want to be alone. You just don't want to admit it."

"And you know that because…" She asked sarcastically leaving him to complete the sentence.

"Because, despite the fact that you are a bitch 99% of the time, no one likes to be alone. Not even the bitchest of them all. And I'm staying because despite all that, I do love you."

"I can't believe you just said that! And I'm not even sure if that's a real word." She tries to put on a disgusting face but fails right away.

"Not like that genius." He says playfully. "I love you because you are on Glee Club too. We've learned that we're family in there, right?" She nods slightly. "So, because we're friends and family in there and the Glee Club time is actually the time you are less bitch than the rest of the day, I'm here looking out for you."

Soon Finn forms that half smile on the corner of his lips that Santana both hated and loved. It annoyed her, but also, brought her some kind of peace.

"Is that ok with you? I mean, if I stay?"

"I guess…" She says trying to sound annoyed. "You won't leave if I ask you will you?" He shook his head proudly. "And you are one gigantic person, how the hell am I supposed to put up against you? I guess you're staying then… But only cos cheerleading practice sucked today and I have no more energy to fight you."

"I guess what you mean with all that was 'THANK YOU' so, You're welcome!"

"Whatever." She mumbled secretly enjoying that he was staying. He actually cared enough to stay.

"Ohh… So, Finn gets to stay and I don't?" Puck called out from two tables behind her.

"Fuck off goody's manwhore."

Finn giggles and Puck find it not so funny.

Brittany walks in and spots Santana sitting with Finn. Her blue eyes soon are met with brown ones. Burning with so many feelings, both girls look down to avoid more eye contact.

Except for a deep caring kiss, nothing else would ever connect them the way their eyes did.

So many things unsaid. So much left undone. So many feelings darting around. So much to be figured out… It was all being reveled by their eyes.

Santana still couldn't figure out what was wrong with Brittany, but something was definitely up and she would have to find out.

Whatever it was that was getting in their way enough to separate them for almost all the classes had to be figured out. She couldn't bear to be without Brittany, and although she secretly enjoyed quite a lot of Finn's company and of course, mostly Quinn's company for the day, she truly missed being around Brittany. She could only hope that she could talk to the blonde on Glee club, which would start in ten minutes. She slowly makes her way to the choir room.

She didn't have to touch her. She didn't have to kiss her. Just hearing Brittany's voice and smelling her scent would have been enough for Santana. Hell, one true and lovely smile directed to her would have been enough.

Instead, she was facing emptiness, anger and most of all, heartache.

Could it possibly be that the one and only SANTANA LOPEZ was getting soft by this one lovely and pretty girl BRITTANY S. PIERCE?

Was it possible that Brittany was actually somehow dominating Santana's feeling? It couldn't be. Could it?

* * *

**So, how was it? Any good at all?**

**Again: I'm not gonna break them, I'll just bend them a little bit. **

**Please, let me know how you feel.**

**And, just so you all know: I have a STRONG feeling you all are going to love the next chapter! **

**Stick around and check up on the next chapter next week. **


	4. Faithfully - Talk to me! (Or don't)

**Guest: Thank you! Don't worry, I will. =)**

**FF: Thank you! You'll find out soon enough, but I don't want to spoil anything, so stay tuned. Update, here you go.**

**StephaniieC: Thank you! Update, here you go.**

**A/N: So, here we are. I bet everyone thought I wasn't gonna update tonight. LOL But here I am!**

**I was actually looking forward to post this chapter, I like it a lot.**

**It's _funny_ and _fluffy_ and _cool _and _cute_... Or not... Anyway... No spoilers!**

**Hope you like it as much as I did.**

**Thanks for all the new followers and favorites of this story.**

**Ok. No more losing time, go ahead for next chapter and have fun.**

* * *

The rest of the day went normally, except that Brittany did actually managed to avoid Santana the whole day, although, she knew it hurt both of them to be apart.

Glee club time was finally here and Santana couldn't wait to finally sit next to Brittany and finally be able to feel like everything was fine again. Smell Brittany's scent and be able to relax like nothing had changed at all. She couldn't wait to finally be able to know what was going on with Brittany. She had to know. It was hurting Brittany, therefore, she would have to know what was going on and fix it.

"What are you doing?" Brittany asked confused as Santana pushed Artie to the other side of the row, pulling a chair for herself where Artie was, right next to Brittany.

"We need to talk."

"Not now, San."

"Yes. And it has to be now. You've been avoiding me and at first I thought it was something that I did, but then, you said it wasn't, and I believed you, you wouldn't lie to me. Right? But I know something is up and now you're really scaring me. Either I did something terrible and you're too mad at me to even admit it, or you did something terrible and now you can't even face me to tell me what's going on. Which one is it?"

"Huh… Is that my mom?" Brittany says looking out the door.

"What?" Santana asks confused since she has her back turned to the door, she didn't see who was coming.

"Mom!" Brittany gets up without responding to Santana's question.

"Hi… I'm sorry. I'm Susan Pierce. I'm here to pick up Brittany?" She says more like a question than an affirmative to Mr. Shue.

"What? Why? Is everything ok?" Mr. Shue asked concerned.

"Well, she called me and she wasn't feeling well. She didn't tell you?" Susan said.

"No, she didn't."

"I'm sorry Mr. Shue. I forgot to tell you." Brittany cut in with her backpack on her hand.

"Well, had you mention it, I would have had the school's nurse to check up on you."

"No. I don't like her. She's mean. She left me there alone for 10 minutes last time and her mouth sticks attacked me during the whole time and then, pretended they hadn't done anything."

"What?" Mr. Shue asked confused. "Oh never mind. Well, go home and get well soon Brittany." He said.

"Thanks Mr. Shue."

Santana got up from her chair and went to hug Brittany.

"You are so not getting away with this talk missy." She whispered. "Get well soon, Britt." She complete letting Brittany go from her embrace.

Brittany went home with her mother, as soon as she arrived home, she took a few cookies from the kitchen and went upstairs to her bedroom, by the time she closed her door her mind was already lost in her thoughts and now, biggest fears.

"**She's about to find out. Ough… Santana! Sometimes I hate how smart you are. **

**[...]**

**Sometimes, I hate that she know exactly what to do to make me burst out all that's in my heart.**

**I hate that she can read me so easily. **

**Sometimes, I wish she was dumb enough not to sense when something is off about me. **

**[...]**

**On the other hand, it's so sweet that she knows me that well. **

**And it's so nice that she love me enough to care and try so hard to figure it out.**

**It's so sweet that she's trying her best to fix this for me.**

**And I do wish she could. I do wish she could. (Tears formed in her eyes)**

**Snap out of this Brittany.**

**Don't be dumb. You know she can't. Nobody can. You know that.**

**Santana can't find this out.**

**Keep her out of this… Keep her –"**

Brittany was forced out of her thoughts when she heard a soft knock on her door.

"Brittany, honey, Santana is here to see you. She's coming in."

Slowly, Susan opened the door and the sight of Santana standing on her door was just too painful for Brittany to bear. Soon, her eyes snap shut. For one second, she wished she was dreaming. She wished Santana wasn't there. It was too close. She had to keep Santana out of this. It was absolutely necessary, although, it hurted as hell to keep her out.

"Feeling any better Britt?" Santana asked with one tone of sarcasm that only Brittany could sense.

"I'll leave you two to talk. I bet Santana will cheer you up a little, honey. Santana, you're family, make yourself comfortable. Yeah?"

"Thanks Mrs. Pierce. Will do."

Susan walked back downstairs, and Santana took a step inside the room, closing the door behind her.

"What do you want?"

Brittany snapped opening her eyes. Honestly, if Santana didn't know Brittany so well, she would've never believed she was talking to the same sweet Brittany.

No one thought Brittany could snap at anyone. Turns out, she could.

But she'd only done that when put under a lot of stress. And she had never used that tone with Santana before.

"Whoa… Calm down Kim Kardashian. I just wanted to make sure you're doing ok."

"Well I am. Is that it?" She closed her eyes again.

"Are you kicking me out? cos if you are I swear I'll go home right now and I'll –"

"No. It's just…" She sits up on her bed. "You keep pressing me into doing something that I don't wanna do."

"And what is it Brittany? What is this thing you don't wanna do? You don't want to make out with me anymore? If it's that, we can stop and-"

"No!" She cuts Santana off. "It's not that… I love making out with you. It's the highlight of my week! It's not that. It's just…" She trails off and her eyes drop to stare at her tights.

"What is it then, Britt? You're scaring me." Santana moves to sit down in front of Brittany. "Britt, what's going on? Tell me. I promise, I'll make everything in my power to help you out with whatever it is. Please, just tell me what it is."

"San, I… I can't. I wish I could talk to you. You always make me feel better and you somehow manage to calm me down no matter what, but trust me, I can't talk about this and later on, I promise, you'll thank me for not telling you. I can't talk about it. Not yet. Can you understand that?"

Tears started to stream down her face and Santana starts to feel her own tears burning in the back of her eyes threatening to fall.

"Hey… Look at me."

She lifts Brittany's chin so Brittany's eyes are now staring right inside of her own. She knew for pure experience that, except for a caring kiss, nothing would ever connect them the way their eyes did.

"Britt, of course I can understand whenever you don't want to talk about something because it's too hard. Although, I wish you did talked to me about it. But I can understand. It's ok to want to keep things for yourself sometimes, but what I cannot understand is how you've been treating me. You left me alone in class to sit with man-hands, and then, with Chang boy, and everything else, and jeez, If wasn't for Frankenteen and Quinn, I would've been alone during all classes. Frankenteen Britt, I enjoyed Finn's company. That's how much lonely and sad I was. You kicked me out of your day completely and that sucks. And I wish you would tell me why. I wish you would just say what's wrong, instead, you keep doing this and it hurts as hell. It's not that I want to force you to talk to me. I don't. But I do want you to stick with me no matter what. You know? You're my best friend and sort of something more. I want you to know you can tell me anything and if you don't want to tell me, you can just sit with me and I'll hug you until you feel better. You know that right?"

"I know, San… I know. I just can't say it and you started to ask too many questions and I couldn't deal with all of them. You made me nervous to be around you. And… And…" She broke down into sobs. "I don't wanna say it. Can I? Can I not say it? It will make it much more real. I want to keep it for myself for now. I can't…"

She sobbed even louder breaking Santana's heart.

"I'm sorry Britt. I guess I pushed you too hard. I was so worried about what was happening that I forgot to worry about how hard I was pushing you against the wall. I'm really sorry. And yes, you can keep it for yourself and I want you to know that I'm here for whenever you feel ready to tell me. Ok? And that is if you ever want to tell me. It's alright to keep it for yourself if you want to."

"Thank you, San."

"Whatever it is, it will be fine Britt…"

"No it won't… Until one of us is dead, it won't." Brittany whispered to herself.

Santana didn't really understood what Brittany said, but she figured she wasn't supposed to.

She stood up and sat behind Brittany resting her back against the headboard.

"Come here! I'll hold you tight until you feel better." She opened her arms for Brittany to rest on her chest and Brittany wasted no time on doing what she was told.

The girls remained on the same position for over twenty minutes, until Brittany's sobs turned into little whimpers.

Santana loosen her tight grip around the blond on her arms, and soon enough, her hands were traveling up and down the girl's back and after a moment, she started to do small circles on her lower back, something she knew Brittany loved.

Almost in a whisper, Santana started to sing a song peacefully into Brittany's ears.

"_My love, there´s only you in my life._

_The only thing that´s right._

_My first love, you´re every breath that I take._

_You´re every step I make and I want to share all my love with you._

_No one else will do._

_And your eyes… They tell me how much you care. _

_Ooh yeah, you will always be my endless love._

_Two hearts that beat as one. Our lives have just begun._

_Forever, I´ll hold you close in my arms._

_And I can´t resist your charms._

_And love, I´ll be a fool for you, I´m sure. _

_You know I don´t mind ´Cause you mean the world to me._

_I know I´ve found in you my endless love._

_OOh, and love, I´ll be that fool for you, I´m sure, you know I don´t mind._

_And, yes! You´ll be the only one ´Cause no one can deny this love I have inside._

_And I´ll give it all to you, my love._

_My love, my love_

_My endless love"_

She finished quietly as tears were now streaming down both their faces.

She meant every single word of that song and Brittany knew it.

"Thank you San… For all of this. It never ceases to amaze me how you can say just the right words to make me feel better. How you can make all the pain go away. You are the most amazing and the sweetest girl I have ever met."

"Sweetest girl? Really?" She giggles.

"Come on. I know you love it. You are my sweet girl. And I love you... I love you for that." The words it was taking them so long to say just slipped out of Brittany's mouth. She was waiting for a rejection or a big shit reaction, but it never came. Instead, one tighter hug did.

"I love you too. For this and for everything, Britt. I love you." Santana replied softly and honestly.

Brittany tilted her head slightly just so she could look into Santana's eyes to make sure she meant it, although, her heart felt it as truth. Finding one reassuring sparkle into Santana's eyes, she laid back on her chest enjoying the smell of Santana and the peace that she felt with Santana's heartbeat beating peacefully against her own.

"Oh girl, you stand by me… I'm forever yours…" Brittany whispered into Santana's chest. One barely audible voice, but still carried all the love from those words.

"Faithfully" Santana finished and planted a kiss on top of Brittany's head. "Faithfully." She repeated.

* * *

**So, how was that? Any good at all? I hope so.**

**For those of you waiting for romantic parts, here they are.**

**_Credits:_**

**The song Santana sang is a duet by _Lionel Richie & Diana Ross_ named _Endless Love._**

**And the words Brittany started and Santana finished is a song by _Journey_ named _Faithfully._**

**I like both songs on their original version, but, honestly, Faithfully had a whole lot more love in it when it was sang by the cast of Glee or by Boyce Avenue. Both covers of Faithfully are amazing.**

**And about Endless Love, I haven't found a cover good enough for this song. I heard it on a wedding (Beautiful one – The bride and the groom sang to each other, as they are both really good singers and they made their own acoustic version of this song, it was amazing.) and I wish I had videotaped it so you guys would understand the magnitude of this song for me and for any couple that sing this to the other (Like Santana did for Brittany). It really expresses a lot.**

**A/N : This week, I might need to go on a travel for work and I'm not sure I'll be able to type and re-read next chapter in time to post it sunday.**

**But stay tuned, I said _"MIGHT"_, I'm not sure yet! Ok? I'll do everything in my power to post the update on time, but if I don't, you already know why.**

**Well, that's it. Thank you for everything and don't forget to tell me how you feel. Reviews are always welcome.**

**See y'all soon.**


	5. Dinner with Mami

A/N So, here I am with another chapter.

Sorry about the delay, but you already know the reason.

**GUEST:** Thank you. I won't. But I must say that the story is all about the secret she's holding and the road they're both taking right now around this secret. (Santana to find the damn secret out, and Brittany to keep the damn secret away from Santana.) If I let you know the secret so fast, the story won't have a way to develop, so I'm dragging this just long enough for me to develop the story. But it won't be long. Stay tuned.

Anyway, I'm pretty tired, so, no more delays, go ahead and have fun!

* * *

"San?" Brittany asked after a while of total silence between the two girls.

"Yes?" Santana replied looking down at the girl resting on her chest.

"Well, I was thinking… Since you're here and everything is fine now and all... Well, we could, I don't know… Get our sweet lady kisses on?" She asked unsure but knowing full well how this would turn out anyway.

"Ohh… Really? And how about your parents?"

"They won't bother." She said kissing Santana's neck. "What do you say?" She asked caressing Santana's sides.

"Oh babe" She smirked and flipped them so Brittany was under her. "You had me at Sweet lady kisses." She complete and leaned down to plant a deep and passionate kiss on the blonde.

"Ok." She pulled Santana off, earning a confused face from the latina. "Only this time, I get to be on top. You know, my boobs are sore for real." She smiled and flipped them over again.

**_X_X_X_X_X_**

"Ohh Santana. Are you leaving already? Dinner is almost ready." Mrs. Pierce smiled at the girl.

"Thanks Mrs. Pierce, but my mom is waiting for me at home."

"Well in this case, tell her I said 'hi'."

"Sure thing, I will. Bye Mrs. Pierce."

"Bye honey."

Brittany walked Santana to the door.

They said their good byes and Santana drove herself home.

Once she walked in to her house, she found her mother setting the table for them to have dinner.

"Hola Mami."

"Hola Mi hija. Thought you wouldn't make it home in time for dinner." She said as she arranged the cups on the table.

"Not this time Mami." Santana giggled. "You are not getting the chance to ground me this week. Not a chance." She laughed lightly.

"Ohhh… Mami would be so pleased to have you grounded home for a whole week." She said as she threw her arms around the girl and pouted playfully.

"Not this time Mami." She laughed again. "But, if it helps, I promise, I'll stay home this Sunday."

"All day?"

"Yes. All day." She planted a quick kiss on her mother's cheek and soon the playful pout was gone. They let go of each other. "Is dinner ready yet?"

"Yep. Go wash your hands and get back down to sit with Mami."

"Can I take a shower first? Like a very quick one? 5 minutes?" She pleads.

"Yeah, yeah… Like you know what is it to take a 5 minutes shower!" She laughed.

"I promise, I'll be real quick."

"Alright. But 5 minutes only, Missy. I'll set the clock up on the microwave."

"Ok Ma'am. I'll be right back."

Santana went running upstairs. By the time she reached the shower, her mind was long gone into a well-known space: BRITTANY.

She couldn't help but wonder what was going on with the girl.

They were best friends and yet, there they were with Brittany determinate not to tell her what was wrong.

She would have to find this out. Although, would've been way easier if Brittany would just tell her.

She went out the shower and put herself into some pajamas and quickly, went downstairs again to have dinner.

"See? Told ya. Quick shower." She said smiling to her mother who was sitting on the couch.

"You do realize you're 15 minutes late, right?"

"Really?"

"Yeah." She said mocking the girl. "Now, come on, let's have dinner cos I'm starving."

"Sure. Me too."

They both sat down at the table and started to eat dinner.

"How was your day today mi amor?"

"Good. Just the usual."

"Yeah?"

"Uhumm.."

"And how's Brittany? You were at her place, weren't you?"

"Yeah.. uh… She's… Uhhh… I forgot Mami… Mrs. Pierce told me to say 'hi' to you."

"Nice of her. And how's Brittany again?"

"yeah.. Humm… She says she's fine."

"She says? You don't believe her?"

"It's not that Mami. I just… Well, she's fine. Let's not talk all about my day. How was your day Mami?"

"Oh you suck at changing subjects, you know?" She laughs. "My day was fine. Not as cool as yours, I assume, but it was fine."

"Nothing you wanna tell me about it Mami?"

"No. Not really. You?"

"No."

The silence fell over them for a minute until Santana broke it.

"Mami, can I ask you something?"

"Course you can, Mi corazioncita."

"Well, humm… Is it – Is it normal... Mami, does boobs ever get sore?"

"Well, it does, really, but not very often. It happens under a few circumstances."

"Which are...?"

"Pregnancy, breast cancer and when they start to grow up. Why honey? Oh Dios mio. Are your breasts sore Santana?"

"No, Mami. Mines are fine. It's just that some girl gave this excuse to bail cheerios' practice today. I wanted to make sure it was true. Do you think she might be pregnant?"

"Who babe?"

"The girl, Mami."

"That depends. Who's the girl?"

"uh, you don't know her."

"Really" Santana nods. "I thought we had a deal, Santana."

"About?"

"Lying."

"I'm not lying Mami." She protested.

"When you lie, you tend not to make eye contact and your lips tremble a little. That's how I know when you're lying. You do know you can tell me anything, don't you?"

"Yes, Mami." She looks down at her plate and a knot formed on her throat. Little did her mother knew she had one major secret that had been held out for 6 months now.

"What is it?"

"Brittany. She said her boobs were sore this morning and I wanted to know if she's ok, but she won't tell me. Do you think she might be pregnant?"

"Well, is she sexually active?"

"Ohhh I don't know." There. The knot just turned bigger. She had two major secrets now. They were both sexually active and she still hadn't told her mom.

"You don't know?"

"No. We don't really talk about it."

"Ok. But since that girl is a cute little angel, I'll suppose not, so I don't think so. And you guys have been best friends for a lifetime now. I think she would've told you if she were."

"Yeah… If you only knew." She mumbled.

"What?"

"Nothing Mami. You're probably right. I'll go brush my teeth now. I think I'll call an early night.

"Ok. Te amo."

"Te amo tambien Mami."

Santana once again went upstairs to her room. She brushed her teeth and went straight to bed.

Tears formed on her eyes as she started to process what her mother had just tell her.

She was a few months older than Brittany, and never had she felt any kind of soreness to her breasts, so she ruled out the "growing up" option.

Brittany was a very healthy person. And if anything was wrong with her heath, she would've told Santana. She ruled out the "breast cancer" option.

Now, only one option was still standing. Was Brittany pregnant?

Could be that her best friend and something more was pregnant with some football player's baby?

It was impossible that Brittany would be pregnant and not tell her. It just doesn't happen. They are best friends. They always told each other everything. Even the most intimate things. Like who was their firsts and how was it. How come she would now hide something like this?

Santana felt her chest tighten at the thought. Tears were now falling freely from her eyes into her pillow soaking it under her.

She had gotten an "I love you" from Brittany and had said "I love you" back to Brittany that night, and yet, she couldn't find that night to be a happy one.

She drifted off to sleep not long after 9pm that night.

The next morning came and Maribel burst into Santana's room.

"Santana, wake up. Wake up, mi amor." She shook the girl. "Santana! Wake up."

"What?" Santana responded not really opening her eyes.

"Wake up." She slapped her arm.

"Ouch! What was that for? Who's dead?"

"YOU! You're gonna be murdered by coach Sue if you don't make it to school in 15 minutes."

"What?"

"It's 7:45am Santana. Come on. Get up."

"Jeez Ma. Why didn't you wake me up earlier?"

"I did. Then, I went to cook you breakfast and you fell back asleep."

"I am gonna die."

"I know. Get up, now! I'll drop you there. I can drive faster."

"Mami, can you call Mrs. Pierce or call Britt and tell her to hold things up? She'll cover this for me."

"Sure."

20 minutes later

"Mami, I can't find my backpack."

"It's down here babe. Come on."

Maribel drove Santana to school as fast as she could, but still, Santana ran 20 minutes late.

She sneaked into cheerios' practice and heard Sue yelling to the girls, like usual.

"So nice of you to join us today, Ms. Lopez. Care to tell us why are you late?"

"I hum… I had a check up to do this morning. I told Brittany to let you know."

"Well, she didn't say anything. Is everything ok?"

"I guess so."

"Well, I'll move you to the bottom, until I receive a copy of your exams."

"What? You can't-"

"Do you want some laps around the field again, Sandbags?" Sue threatened.

"No. I don't."

"Good."

Sue turned around and Santana looked to her right to find Brittany looking everywhere but at her.

"You didn't warn her?"

"About?"

"Me! Being late a little."

"Nope." She responded with an extra pop to the "P" in the end.

"Why not? I told my mom to call you or your mom. She didn't?"

"Ohh I am well aware of what you told your mom." She said and walked away leaving Santana confused and angry behind.

* * *

Well, that was that.

Hope you like it.

See y'all next chapter. =)


	6. Tears & Dreamless Sleep

**A/N**

**StephaniieC: Some answers' up. Or not. Hahaha Off.. Did you see that? Naya getting married out of nowhere?! What the hell? Hahaha Ok, psycho Naya aside, thank you! Just wait and see, we're getting there. Update, here you go. **

**Guest: Thanks for giving it a chance to this. A bit off. I got that and I've worked on it. Hope you like it better from now on! It's original, I can assure you that. Just stick around and I promise I'll do my best to not let you down. Thank you!**

**So, I'm really sorry about the delay on this chapter. I know, it was just 2 days of delay, if you count, but, still, I'm late and I apologize. **

**Why am I late? For a lot of reasons, but the biggest? A dumbass lady crushed the front of my car last Saturday night and it gave me a hell of a headache for the whole weekend. Honestly, I couldn't bring myself to read anything on Sunday. Especially not something I wrote myself. I had already typed this, but I had to re-read it to make sure everything was right and that I couldn't do. **

**And yesterday, I had to work and go after the lady who crushed my car, cos yeah, way too expensive for me to pay for her dumbness. **

**Anyway, my problems apart, I like this chapter very much but honestly, I'm not sure what's going to cross the mind of all of you.**

**Just letting you know: Please review, but don't be rude or too harsh on me. Remember: This is the first time I'm writing a glee story. I'm not really used to this fandom and I'm a human being, I'll make mistakes. Just let me know and I'll work on it. (Why am I saying this? Cos I got two very rude pm's. That's not very nice people!) **

**Anyway, thanks for everything everyone. No more delays, go ahead and have fun!**

* * *

Time came for the both of them to attend on Glee club.

Santana walked in as everybody else was already there, including Brittany.

"What is wrong with you?" Santana inquired angrily.

"What?" Brittany looked up at the angry latina in front of her.

"I always have your back when you need me. Not once have I let you down, and now, when I need you, what do you do? You throw me in the fire. So I'm asking, what is wrong with you?"

"I did not throw you on the fire, for whatever that means. There was no fire in there. So I don't really know what that means."

"It means you didn't have my back Brittany. That's what it means. I told you to hold things up, like we always did for each other and this time-"

"You told me?" Brittany cut her off. "Are you sure?"

"Well, I told my mom to call."

"Exactly. Your mom called my mom this morning. I'm grounded now. My mom put a strict curfew by 6pm and I'll have to wash the dishes after dinner for two weeks. And she took all my unicorns away."

"Wait. What? Why did she grounded you?"

"Come on. Don't act like you don't know."

"Well, care to share? I really have no idea."

"Well, your mom told my mom to check up on my boobs cos, well, according to her, I might be pregnant." She yelled causing everyone to look at them.

"Mind your own business, people, will ya?" Santana said angrily at everyone looking. " My mom said that?"

"Yes. And now, my mom thinks I'm pregnant. I'm grounded until the doctor's appointment in two weeks. She tried to check up my boobs, Santana. MY MOM CAME TO CHECK UP MY BOOBS BECAUSE OF YOU AND THIS BIG MOUTH OF YOURS."

"Girls, that's enough." Said mr. Shue coming inside the choir room.

"I didn't ask her to say this. I just told her to ask you to hold things up for me. That's all."

"Really? And where did all of this come from?"

"I have no idea." Santana said as her eyes started to tear up.

"YOU'RE LYING. COME ON. AT LEAST ADMIT IT. YOU SAID SOMETHING TO YOUR MOM."' Brittany yelled upset.

"You're out of your mind."

"Me? YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME. YOU SOLD ME OUT."

"I didn't. I swear. But you know what? THINK WHATEVER YOU WANT OUT THIS. I DON'T CARE." Santana yelled back at her this time.

"GIRLS! I said enough!" Said mr. Shue. "You used be friends. What happened?"

"NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!" Santana yelled again. "You know what Brittany? You want to be mad at me, that's fine. You want to yell because you got grounded? That's fine too. But you don't want believe me? That's a little too much. SCREW YOU. Ok? I didn't ask my mom to say any of this. I would never ask her to. You should know that by now." She yelled causing the blonde to drop the tears she worked so hard to hold back.

"Ok. Santana, that's enough. Ok? Just leave her alone. Your words are hurting her." Artie said.

"What? My words are hurting her? SHE is accusing me of something I didn't do and I AM the one hurting her? But whatever. Mind your own business!"

"No, San. He's right. We just want you to calm down. Ok?" Said Mercedes trying to reason with Santana.

"Ohh Now you? Who else is going to meddle in our business?"

"Santana, we all know your words can crush all of us together, and it's not ok, cos it really hurts us, but somehow, we all manage to put up with, but Brittany? Like, Seriously?"

"Oh you dwarf? Hell to the no! Screw you all. I won't stand here for this."

"Santana, calm down. Guys, enough of this already."

"Screw it. I'm not staying for this." She grabbed her bag from the floor where she had thrown it and with one last glance at Brittany, she turned on her heels and left.

**PHONE CALL ON**

"Mami?"

"Yes? Are you crying Mi hija?"

"It's ok mami. Can you pick me up?"

"What happened?"

"I just need to go home. Please?"

"Sure. I'll be there in 15 minutes."

"Thanks."

"Te amo."

"Te amo tambien Mami."

**PHONE CALL OFF**

Maribel arrived and soon, noticed her daughter sitting in the steps of the stairs of the school.

"Mami." Santana cried out as soon as she saw her mother walking her way. "Mami." She cried again as she wrapped her arms around Maribel's neck. Not a second after that, Santana was a mess of sobs.

"What's wrong mi corazoncita?" Maribel asked after a few minutes.

"Nothing, just take me home, please?"

"Sure." She hugged her daughter tighter until the sobs decreased to whimpers. "I need to go in there mi hija. I need to sign up the forms for you to leave."

"I'm not going back in there."

"It's ok. Just wait in the car then. I'll be right back!"

She walked into the school and Santana went to wait on the car. Around ten minutes later, Maribel came back and got into the car.

She drove them both home in silence.

As soon as they arrived, Santana went straight to her bedroom crying all over again.

Maribel didn't really know what to do, since she didn't know what had happened.

She followed her daughter upstairs and knocked on her door.

She didn't wait for a response, as she opened the door and walked in.

Her heart broke a little from what she saw.

Santana had laid in the bed and curled herself up into a ball and was crying uncontrollably.

She sat on the bed right next to the girl and soon, her hand was drawing small circles on the girl's back.

It didn't seem to help though, since her sobs got even louder.

"Santanita?" The woman asked worried. "Talk to Mami. What happened?"

"I just want to be alone for a while to get my thoughts back together. That's all. "

"I'm sorry, coraciozita. I can't leave you alone right now. You're my daughter and I'm supposed to protect you and take care of you and love you no matter what. I wouldn't be doing this right if I just 'leave you alone', as you request. Talk to me."

Santana didn't respond. She just buried her face into her pillow and cried harder than before, not really being able to help herself.

The loud sobs echoed into the room and silently, Maribel's heart broke even more.

She had one serious theory on what had happened, and according to it, it was her fault that her baby was crying like this.

Guilty plastered all over her face, although, she tried hard to hide it.

She wrapped her arms around her daughter's small frame and brought her as close as possible as she laid down next to her.

Santana instantly, turned around and buried her face into the of her mother's neck sobbing and trembling just as hard as before.

Maribel whispered soothing words into her ears, and again, it was no use for them, Santana sobbed just as hard as she had before and Maribel knew, deep in her heart, this was bigger than what she thought it would be.

She was laying there with her daughter for God knows how long, until Santana's loud sobs decreased into whimpers and random sniffs.

Seeing as the girl had calmed down substantially, Maribel decided to talk again.

"So, now that you're calm enough, will you tell me what's wrong?"

She shook her head no as the even the thought of what went down between her and Brittany made her upset all over again.

"Cielo, remember what we always talk about holding everything inside. Do you remember what I always tell you about this?" She feels Santana nodding slowly into her neck. "It does you no good at all. Right? So tell me, It's Brittany, isn't it?"

A few seconds of silence fell over them until Santana replied the question.

"Yes." She sobbed again. "Mami, did you say anything about our conversation to Mrs. Pierce?"

Maribel hung her head and that was the answer Santana needed.

"Mami, why did you do this? Now Mrs. Pierce grounded her and she's mad at me and I don't think she's going to forgive me this time."

"I'm so sorry Santana. I just… I was worried about her. I really like her cielo, I don't want her to get in trouble. I was just worried and I'm really sorry."

"Mami, that was supposed to stay between you and me. You shouldn't have said anything to Mrs. Pierce. Brittany is really mad."

"Honey, Brittany is the sweetest thing ever. She'll come around. She'll understand it was my mistake not yours. I'll apologize and she'll come around, you'll see."

"You didn't see her Mami. She yelled at me." She sobbed hard again. "She yelled at me in front of the whole glee club. She said that I sold her out."

"Is that why you called me to pick you up?"

"Yes."

"San…"

"No, Mami. If that isn't enough, everyone stood up for her and none of them actually stood up for me, cos well, according to them I'm a bitch and my words hurt people."

"Watch it." Maribel warned.

"Mami, I'm so mad at everyone. I mean, I know I am not sweet at all-"

"You are to me." Maribel cut her off trying to light the mood.

"Mami!"

"Sorry."

"I know I am not a very nice person to them, but still, I thought they would at least recognize when I was right about something. She was wrong, Mami. She accused me of selling her out to her mom but I didn't and she won't believe me. She thinks I told you on purpose. She literally raised her voice and yelled at me. I don't think she has ever yelled at me before."

"I know cielo. It's bad. I get it, but I'll apologize to her and to Linda and I'm sure she'll understand honey. I'll explain to her that you were worried about her, I'll make this right. Ok?"

Santana nods and Maribel brings her closer again and the girl buries her face back on her mother's neck as Maribel placed kisses all over the top of her head.

"Now, will you let me go? Cos, I need to start dinner already and I guess I have a couple of phone calls to make."

Santana pulled away and her mother kissed her all over her face causing the girl to smile. It was the first genuine smile of the day.

"I'll call you when dinner is ready."

"Ok. Thanks."

Maribel went downstairs and was about to call the Pierces when her phone rang.

**PHONE CALL ON**

"Hello?"

"Maribel? Hi. It's Linda."

"Oh, yes. Hi Linda. I was about to call you."

"Sorry, Maribel, but I have something to tell you about our girls."

The old friends talked on the phone for about 15 minutes as Maribel's anger boiled up to the top.

"Ok Linda. I'll talk to her. Thanks for letting me know. But honestly, I was out of line with Brittany, do you mind telling her that I'm sorry and that it was not Santana's fault? I mean, I'll ground Santana anyway, according to what she says about this, but still, I intend on keeping my promise and apologizing."

"I don't think you should worry about it Mari, you were worried about her and I appreciate what you did. For real, she's mad at Santana and all, but she'll come around. I wouldn't do anything differently from what you did if it was the other way around. Thanks for telling me."

"Alright. See you soon Linda."

"See ya, Mari."

**PHONE CALL OFF**

Maribel hung up the phone and she couldn't feel more broken-hearted than she was right now.

She worked so hard for when this moment came around she wouldn't be the last to know. She worked so hard to build a relationship based on trust and direct conversation just so this moment wouldn't be like this.

She took a moment to breathe, as she realized she was way too mad to breathe properly when she was on the phone.

A few minutes went by and she decided it was time to go up and talk to her daughter.

She walked up and opened the door to Santana's room, she soon noticed the girl was sound asleep.

"**She must be exhausted."** She thought to herself as she stood still by the door frame of Santana's bedroom.

The day had been long for the girl, and although she was very mad at Santana for not telling her this, she couldn't find it in her heart to be mad enough to wake up the girl only to give her a speech about the news she had just received.

Of course, the news wouldn't burn low for the girl. She would be woken up earlier than usual to talk about this and would be grounded as well. After all, this was serious and she had to face the consequences not for what she did, but for how she did it. For not telling her mother about it.

"**I can't believe it. My baby! Oh Santana Maria Lopez, we are so going to talk about this in the morning"** She thought to herself.

Looking at her daughter fast asleep with a trail of tears down her cheeks broke her heart and soon, she felt the powerful sob take over her.

she left the girl's room and went to her own.

She took a shower as the sobs escaped her mouth effortlessly.

After she was done, she walked out of the shower and put herself into some pajamas.

No dinner was eaten that night.

Not on the Lopez's home, nor on the Pierce's home.

Maribel laid in bed that night and cried herself to sleep. Barely she knew Linda had done just the same. Only that she did it for so many other reasons.

Brittany, on the other hand, laid awake in bed that night as the thoughts of the event of the day went through her mind.

Tears were streaming down her face as she thought about what she would do next.

She was so mad at the Latina, but also so mad at herself.

She didn't have to do what she did.

She didn't have to yell at her as well. But she was so mad. Now it was done and there was nothing she could about it. All she could do was regret her poor decision and hope that Santana wouldn't be too mad at her.

Lord Tubbington climbed on her bed and soon, made his space comfortable right next to Brittany's belly, but as soon as she tried to caress the cat, it slightly pulled away, not enough to get off the bed, but enough for Brittany to notice.

"I know. I know. I'm mad at myself too. I shouldn't have done it, but, I did. Now what?"

Silence.

"Yeah. Guess tonight is the night of tears. I bet she's crying too. Do you think she's crying? I hate it when she cries. It breaks my heart."

Silence.

"I know okay? No need to be so rude. I'll fix this tomorrow. I shouldn't have yelled at her and I shouldn't have accused her as well. I know she had the best intentions on telling her mom. She was worried. I know. But tonight, nothing I can do except for crying everything out so I can have my mind clean tomorrow."

The cat 'meowed' for her.

"Night Lord Tubbington." She whispered to the cat as she saw his eyes slowly and lazily closing as the cat dozed off to sleep.

"**NIGHT OF TEARS, THAT'S WHAT TONIGHT IS. THE NIGHT OF TEARS." **Was the last thought that crossed Brittany's mind before she dozed off as well, that was one of those nights Brittany hated so much. One of those where you fall asleep but you fall into a dreamless sleep. She always hated the nights she didn't dream about anything. Dream land was always a place the blonde loved to visit. To be honest, she looked forward for it.

Barely Brittany knew that, not only that night was the night of tears, but also, the night of the dreamless sleep as all four women laid in their beds sleeping into nothingness.

* * *

**Well, that was it. **

**Thanks for everything and don't forget to tell me how you feel. **

**See y'all soon. **


	7. Broken Promises

**A/N**

**So, here it goes another chapter. Sorry about the delay, but I re-wrote this one for what it felt like a thousand times, and I seemed to never get it right. It got me worked up and frustrated, to be honest. But I'm in fact content with the final result. **

**As you guys will notice, this turned out to be a little bigger than the others so I had more trouble fixing this one to post, therefore, it created some delay on it, for what I'm sorry about. **

**This is the biggest chapter, so far, so it took me quite some time to get through all the corrections on this one. **

**Thank you all for sticking around for this. All the favorites and follows, thank you! I really hope to not let you down when the secret is finally out. **

**julzy04: Thank you! Right? That's obvious, but apparently, Santana was innocent enough to think otherwise. Well, about work it out, let's just wait and see. **

**Guest 01: Thank you. Update, here you go. **

**Guest 02: My pleasure and thank you for keep reading. I really hope I don't let you down. Be sure I'm working hard to keep up with the expectations for this story. Well, I'm the one writing this and sometimes I find hard to know who to side with, so far, I haven't really picked sides and I probably won't any time during this story, therefore, it will make it hard for you guys to pick sides too and honestly, I'm loving it and I find it highly amusing. I know what you meant with Maribel's hopes and it will get a little bit clearer at this chapter. You'll see why she got so mad and what was up to bring her to the decision of grounding. Nothing to be sorry about, I loved your review. Thank you for everything.**

**Well, no more delays, go ahead and have fun.**

* * *

The next morning, Maribel's eyes snapped open.

She glanced at the clock on her bedside marking 4:17 am on red big numbers and realized she woke up earlier than she thought she would, but then, she thought it was for the best to be this way. It gave her time to think about Santana.

She hopped out of bed and took a shower. She walked into her bedroom again and it was 4:40 am. She dressed herself for the day and went downstairs.

She decided not to eat breakfast just yet. She would wait for Santana.

She made herself a cup of coffee and went to Santana's room upstairs. The girl was still sound asleep as Maribel entered her room.

She took a good look on her daughter's and realized at some point at night, Santana must've woken up, her Cheerios uniform was off and her hair was hanging loose all over her pillow and her face.

She took some strands of hair out of Santana's face and kissed her forehead ever so softly as tears came to her eyes again.

She loved the girl so much and what she was about to do would upset the girl a lot, but it was necessary. For the love of her daughter, she had made a decision.

She looked around the room and found the uniform laying on a chair on the corner of the room. She took it downstairs and washed it, as she was supposed to do the night before, but given everything that happened, this never even crossed her mind.

She put the uniform on the dryer machine and went into the kitchen again. One more cup of coffee and another glance on a clock, 5:30 am. She finished the coffee and walked back upstairs to Santana's room. She had made up her mind and probably, she wouldn't change it, but she would grant Santana a chance.

So it was time to talk to Santana about everything and according to what was about to come, she would break the news to her.

"Santana?" She shook the girl trying to wake her up. "Santana, wake up."

"What? Mami… What time is it? Am I late again?"

"No, you're not. But it's time to wake up. Get yourself clean and then, go downstairs. Come on. Hurry up."

She slowly and lazily opened her eyes and glanced at the clock on her bedside. 5:40 am.

"Ohh Mami. It's way too early. I can sleep for another hour."

"No, you can't. Come on Santana. Get up and go clean yourself and get back here."

Santana huffed on the bed and crossed her arms around herself in defiance.

"Santana, please, don't test me today. Get out of bed right now before I kick you out of it. Don't make me, please."

Santana took a look on her mother's face and soon, the defiance and the attitude on her was gone. She hopped out of bed and entered the bathroom. She knew something serious was up. Might as well not piss her mother off.

She walked out of the shower and went to dress herself, she remembered she had left her uniform on the chair last night, she wrapped a towel around herself and went into the room.

The uniform was long gone, and she couldn't find it anywhere. Her mother wasn't on the room either, she kept looking for the uniform, until, she took a look around and noticed a black box that she knew very well sitting on her bookshelf.

She walked to the other side of the room and took the box on her hands opening immediately only to find out it was empty.

Since she couldn't find her uniform anywhere, she decided to put on pair o jeans and black t-shirt.

She dried her hair quickly and put on some make up and as soon as she finished, she went downstairs to meet her mother.

"Mami?"

"In the kitchen Mi hija." Santana walked slowly into the kitchen and her mother told her to take a seat as soon as she did, Maribel started talking.

"So, Santana, last night, I talked to Linda."

"Did you apologized to Britt?" She asked hopefully.

"No. I mean, I did. I kept my promise. I apologized and told her I was out of line, only that I didn't have much of a chance to talk to Brittany herself, so I'm trusting Linda to pass the message. I believe she will."

"That's ok Mami. I believe she will too. Thanks for doing this."

"You know, Santana, I kept my word. As I always said I would, I kept my word and I did what I promised you I would. Now, apparently, I'm the only one keeping promises around here."

"What – What do you mean Mami?" Santana stuttered out.

"Last night, when I was about to call Linda, she called me first and she let me know about something really big and I have been wondering if you won't tell me yourself. Don't you have anything to tell me?"

"Mami, I'm not following where this is going." She said with fear all over her face.

"Santana you are not hiding anything from me, are you? Cos I remember all the promises we made to each other after your Papi left. Do you remember?"

Santana hung her head. She had no idea what this was about, but still, being what she was thinking or not, it didn't change the fact that she had kept secrets from her mother even thought she promised a million times she never would.

Her Papi had cheated on her Mami and kept it a secret for so long. When the secret came out, it almost destroyed the family. Her Papi went away, her Abuela refused to talk to him, since he had brought disgrace to the family's name, her abuelo had a heart attack and died and her uncle joined the army to run away of all the mess that secret had made.

But above all this, her Mami got depressed. She would cry for hours in a whole and the pain in her eyes seemed endless.

But one thing caught her attention on all this: Her mother never stopped caring for her. She never forgot to cook her breakfast, or to wash her uniform on a daily basis, or to pay her phone bill earlier so she wouldn't go low on it, or to buy her dots candy every time she went on grocery shopping. Not once had her mother forget anything when it came to her. She continued to act like the best mother she could ever wish for, even though she was heartbroken from everything that went down.

The pain was visible on her eyes, and yet, she put on a brave mask only not to hurt her daughter, and even after what Emilio did, she never talked bad about him. She never threw him on the fire with her daughter.

Her mother had never kept any secrets from the girl, and after this, she only made it clearer that no secrets were supposed to be kept between her and her daughter.

Now, it came a moment when she had two big secrets and one of them (probably) was about to come out.

Tears came to her eyes when she thought about it and she couldn't help but tremble in anticipation to what was coming.

"Santana!" Her mother called again forcing the girl out of her thoughts. "What did we promise each other long ago?" No response. "I worked so hard to make sure no secret was kept between us. I trusted you all along. I trusted you to tell me everything. Did you?"

No response again.

"Alright, you won't tell me? It's alright. Let me break it down for you then. Look at me." Santana kept looking at her hands. "I am not kidding Santana. Raise your head and look at me." She slowly did as she was told noticing that her mother's eyes were watery. "Linda called me to let me know that last night, Brittany confessed to her that the both of you are sexually active."

Tears started to stream down Santana's face. Both, from relief and pain. She was hurt. (Not really for what was happening. That was bound to happen. At some point, her mother would have to know.) She was hurt because Brittany had done it and she knew the girl had done it out of vengeance.

"And not only that, Santana, but she also told Linda both of you have already slept with 90% of the football team and there's a lot of people on a football team."

"Mami, I – I…" She stuttered out not really able to form a sentence.

"You what Santana? Are you going to look into my eyes and tell me you did not do what she said? You better work fast on your mind to sell yourself high and convince me otherwise if this is not true, cos I'm really mad at you right now. You betrayed my trust."

At the word 'betrayed' Santana felt her cheeks burning with anger. SHE was the one who had been betrayed. Brittany had broken the promise they made for each other. They always promised the secrets they had between them would die between them.

She never intended on hurting her mother, but honestly, she couldn't even understand it. What was the big deal on the fact that she had experienced sex with a some people? Isn't that what everyone does at high school?

"What? Are you mad at me because I slept with some people?" She said before thinking.

Fat tears came down her mother's eyes soaking her shirt.

"NO. I'm mad at you for not telling me. What you did was wrong. You shouldn't be sleeping around and making yourself an easy go for the boys, but that's not even what hurts me the most! NOT TELLING ME is what hurts me the most." She responded angrily. "You always promised to tell me everything just the way I always did to you. I never kept anything from you. And I've been here all along. Always ready to listen to you and then what? You hide this. How many times have I asked you about this? How many times have I explained to you that you should tell about your plans to your first time so I could take you to the doctor? How many times Santana?"

"I don't need a doctor Ma. I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING! I'm not a ghost anymore Mami. I have my own way of life now. I know what I'm doing. I don't need any advice on this. AND IT WAS NOT HER PLACE TO TELL YOU!" She shouted angrily.

"Watch your tone with me Santana." She warned. "You're right. It wasn't her place to tell me. But since you didn't, and may I add IT WAS YOUR PLACE TO DO SO, but since you didn't, I'm glad someone did!"

Santana sobbed loud and Maribel felt the anger taking over both of them. She knew it would do them no good to discuss this while they were both angry and emotional.

"Go upstairs to your bedroom. I'll cook you some breakfast and then, you can come down again."

"Don't bother on cooking to throw it away. I'm not hungry."

"You will eat it though. It's not up for discussion."

She huffed and got out of her chair walking through the living room making her way to her bedroom.

She spotted her cheerios uniform on the couch and quickly, went to pick it up.

"Don't bother putting it on to take it out. You won't wear it." Her mother said as she rested her right side on the doorframe of connection from the kitchen to the living room.

"What? I have to wear it daily, Mami, you know that."

"I'll go up to talk to you in a minute. But you're leaving this uniform right there."

Santana felt a pang on her stomach. She knew she would be grounded. She just hoped it wasn't for longer than 2 weeks. She would hate to be off the cheerios for too long.

She walked up to her room and glanced again at the clock on her night stand. 7:00 am. She was supposed to be starting her day right now. Instead, her day had already started and had quite enough drama for a whole week.

She laid down on her bed thinking about everything that had happened just an hour before downstairs.

It was never her intention to break her mother's trust, nor to hurt her, like she claimed Santana did.

She understood after all that happened that her mother was not one to bear secrets, but, explode like that over something she should already be aware of? Seriously, what was that?

Tears streamed down her face. She had been betrayed by Brittany and also, had disappointed her Mami. She had tons of emotions running through her and everything was just overwhelming.

She needed to breathe outside, but she knew better than to go outside when her mom was this mad at her.

She curled herself into a ball letting the sobs of the overwhelming feelings take over her. She cried out everything that was on her mind until she had no more tears to drop.

She opened her eyes again and instantly, she knew they were swollen. She remembered then that she was supposed to go to school. She had completely forgot about the time, and when she looked back to the clock, it was 9:30am. **"I must've fallen asleep."** She thought to herself.

She laid back on the bed and not a second later, she heard the unmistaken hard breathing of her mother entering her room.

The fact that she didn't bother to knock first already told Santana that she was about to get into serious trouble. **"There it comes."** She thought.

"Came to finish the job and suffocate me with a pillow?" Santana asked not really looking to the woman.

"No. I came here to finish the job and ground you."

"Shoot it."

"That's it? No bargain? No crying? Nothing? You won't even try and defend yourself? That's how much guilty you are?"

"Is it gonna change anything? I mean, if I beg and if I cry… Will it change the sky for you? You've made up your mind Mami."

"Indeed, I have made up my mind about what's your punishment. But I think you owe me an apology for lying to me and an explanation."

"I know." She looked down and a new wave of tears came down her face. "And I am so sorry Mami, for not telling you. But I can't give an explanation about this to you. I have no explanation."

"Why did you do it?" She asked brokenly.

"I just- I… I don't know." She sighed and her face softened.

"Was it pressure of everyone else?"

"No."

"Then why? Did you like someone and decided it was time?"

"Not really Mami."

"Your first time wasn't even out of love?" She asked as tears came down her cheeks again.

"Mom. It was-I…" She thought about her first time for a second and soon snapped. "I don't wanna talk about this. Just ground me already." The anger got back full force as confusion hit her.

"Ok. You don't want to talk about it. Apparently, you never want to talk about anything."

"It was not what I meant Mami. Please, just get this over with. How long?"

"Your curfew is 5pm sharp, Santana. One minute late, and there goes your phone, laptop, Ipod and all."

"5 pm sharp. Got it."

"Your –"

"Wait there's more?" She cut Maribel off and asked shocked.

"Wait and see." Santana sighed again. "Your bed time is going to be at 9 pm. No tv time for you."

"Mami, no…" She whined out. "I'll never be able to sleep at 9pm."

"Not up for discussion Santana." She warned.

"Ok." She said between gritted teeth. "What else?"

"I want your car keys. I'll be driving you to school and pick you up afterwards."

"So not fair."

"You want to talk about fair? Are you sure?" She warned and half-shouted.

"No." She crossed her arms in front of herself.

"Good. Now, last but not least, I made a phone call while you were up here." Santana braced herself for what was coming. She half knew, but she could never guess what was to come. "Coach Sue is waiting for your uniform tomorrow by 7:30am." Maribel continued.

"WHAT?" She shouted while Maribel was still talking. "HELL TO THE NO."

"You are no longer part of her squad."

"YES, I AM. YES, I AM." She shouted and started to cry heavily. "SHE CAN'T DO THIS. EVERYONE ON THAT SQUAD HAS HAD SEX IN THEIR LIVES. WHY IS SHE KICKING ME OUT? NO. NO. NO. NO."

"Not her decision Santana. It was mine."

"NO… WHY DID YOU DO THIS? POR QUÉ? Llámala y dile que estabas equivocado, Mami. No voy a dejar El equipo. No quiero Mami. Por favor?"

"Ahora todo esta hecho, no hay que decir, Mi hija. Organice su uniforme y ló puso en La caja. Debe volver lo mañana."

"No Mami, por favor..."

"Esta hecho Santana."

Santana sobbed loudly on her bed once again knowing her mother wasn't kidding.

Maribel stood from the bed she had previously sat at and walked out the door.

She figured it would be best to give her daughter some time alone to deal with the news.

Half an hour had passed and Santana had no more tears to cry. She got up and noticed her mother had left a tray with breakfast on her desk.

Once again, she knew best than to provoke her mother by not eating even though it was a little late for breakfast.

She didn't want her to pull her out glee club too, so she decided to try and eat it anyway.

Besides, the night before, she fell asleep before dinner. She was in fact hungry now.

After she was done, she went downstairs with the tray. She walked into the kitchen and her heart broke a little from what she saw.

Her mother was looking through some family photo album of when she was younger and tears were streaming down her face.

Right then, she understood what she had done wrong and why her mother was so mad at her.

She was her mother's only girl.

"**I'm her baby girl. She still remembers me as her scared little girl who made her a promise to never lie nor hide anything, just not to break her heart like her husband had just done.  
I broke my promise to her and also reminded her of my dad.  
That's what broke her heart. Not only I kept a secret, but I did exactly like my dad.  
I acted like I was right to hide a secret. Like it was no big deal."**

"I am so deeply, deeply sorry, Mami."

Santana whispered and wrapped her arms around her mother from behind her.

"I never meant to hurt you. I am so sorry, Mami. And I promise from now on, I'll do my best to not keep any secrets from you. I didn't mean to break your heart like he did. But now, it's done and there's nothing I can say to change it. Broken promises hurt just as bad as a cut from a sharp knife, and for breaking my promise, I am indeed very sorry, Mami. Will you forgive me?"

Maribel broke down into loud sobs and this time it was Santana's turn to feel guilty over the situation and to try and soothe her mother.

After 20 minutes, or so, Maribel had calmed down. She turned around and pulled Santana into a tight hug.

"You are not your father, baby girl. That never crossed my mind. You did hurt me though, and for that, I accept your apology."

"**Na eínai kalýtero próso̱po apó ó patéras sou**. I'll do better than He did, Mami. I promise. And I won't make a broken promise out of this."

"I know you won't."

* * *

**A/N **

**So that was it. Hope you liked. **

**The part where Santana and Maribel talk in Spanish… Well, here's what it meant:**

"_WHY? Call her and tell her you were wrong, Mami. I will not leave the team. I don't want to Mami. Please? "_

_"Now everything is done, there's nothing else to say, Mi hija. Organize your uniform and put it in the box. You must return it tomorrow. "_

_"No Mami, please ..." _

_"It's done, Santana."_

**The reference to the phrase Santana said is on a show that I loved and miss dearly: FRINGE.**

**It's a greek phrase and originally on the tv show, the phrase is this one: "Na eínai kalýtero anthrópo apó ton patéra tou." But I changed a little, because the original means "Be a better man than your father." **

**The version of the phrase that I used means "Be a better person than your father."**

**I just wanted to say that I don't speak Spanish nor Greek, for what matters, so if you find any mistakes, feel free to tell me. **

**About the guest 02's coment: I wouldn't be mean enough to out Santana like this. She'll come out to her mother on what I think is her own terms. **

**See y'all soon.**


	8. Aftermath - Time stands still

**Hello everybody. I bet you thought I would have a delay on this one too, right?**

**Yeah, for a few hours I thought I wouldn't be able to post this one tonight, but I was determinate to post it because I already had delays on the last two chapters, I wouldn't be happy to have a delay on this one too. **

**This is also a big chapter. Bigger than last one, therefore, another handful to deal with and fix.**

**The underlined words in the middle of the chapter are the representation of text. I guess you guys will get that, but just in case, I thought I should let you know.**

**So here it goes, but considering its past 2am here, please, forgive me for any mistakes and please, don't hesitate on telling me.**

**I am beyond tired and I have to work tomorrow. Can you picture my "Panda Face" tomorrow (or is it today? Oh, well, whatever) when I have to get up again at 6am. Yep. I'll look like a Panda and no, not on the cute way.**

**Guest: She's trying though! Hahaha Hope you're enjoying.**

**Guest 2: THANK YOU SO MUCH! It's my pleasure to work on this and give my best on it for you all. But I'm really glad you liked it. Told you! There was a point on both their pov's, Maribel's and Santana's. haha Thanks. Well, something is definitely up with Britt. We're coming close to get huge hints on what is it. Brittany is going through a lot right now. San doesn't know yet and Britt don't want to tell yet, so that's where the 'Bitchy!Brittany' came from. Doesn't look good? Wait and see! Hahaha And after all this: THANK YOU SO MUCH. Your review just made my night! **

**Thank you all for everything and no more delays, go ahead and have fun!**

* * *

Maribel and Santana stayed there hugging tightly to each other for quite a while, until Santana's phone ring broke them apart.

She picked the phone of her backpack where she left it the night before, looked at the screen to see who was calling and there she was. Beautiful and deep blue eyes and a smile that could light up the whole world were on her screen.

"Who is it?" Maribel asked. "Won't you pick that up?"

"No." Santana said simply. "Can I go out?"

"Where?"

"I wanted to take a walk. The park, maybe?"

"Sure. Be back for lunch though. Will ya?"

"Sure, Mami."

Santana picked her coat and walked out of the house.

She walked her way to a park near her house and sat under the tree she loved the most: A sakura tree.

She looked at a few kids playing on the playground right ahead and couldn't help the tears that came to her eyes as an image of herself and Brittany played on her mind.

How come they reached this point? How come her best friend did this?

She didn't intend on getting Brittany grounded, but Brittany sure intended on grounding her.

She felt tears burning her cheeks as she cried silently for the whole situation.

She had been broken-hearted and also broke her mami's heart. She felt a sharp pain on her stomach and immediately felt sick.

She ran towards the dumpster on the right entrance of the park and emptied the contents of her stomach.

She sat back on her spot and stared ahead of where she was and the tears came back more than quickly and she hung her head once again.

She sat there crying in silence until she felt something hot reaching for her right cheek. She looked up and was met with blue little eyes.

"Why are you crying? Are you sad?" Asked the little girl.

"What?"

"You're crying. Mommy says that when someone is crying, it's because they're sad. Like a sad panda. Are you sad?"

"I'm a little bit upset. That's all."

"Why?"

"Why what?" Santana asked confused.

"Why are you upset?"

"You wouldn't understand. Go play with your friends." She sniffed and cleaned her face with the sleeves of her coat.

"I don't have friends." She responded sadly and looked down at her feet.

"How come?"

"Well, they make fun of me cos I'm smaller than they are and we're the same age. Mommy says it's because I'm a preview."

"I think you meant a preemie. As in you were born earlier?"

"Yes."

"Well, too bad for them. You seem nice and it's their loss to not have you as a friend."

"My Mommy says this too. But it's really not cool to not have friends."

"It will get better. You'll find a friend that will be the best ever and then, you'll see. You lost nothing by waiting."

"Do you think so?"

"I'm sure."

"Do you think you can be my friend in mean time? I mean, it's really boring to be alone all the time. And you're sad too. Maybe I can help you."

"I think I'm a little too big to be your playmate."

"I didn't say a playmate." She giggled.

"Well, isn't that what friends do at your age?"

"Yeah, but, I don't like to play there anymore. I just wanted to sit here with you." She said.

"And do what?" Santana asked curiously and feeling slightly better already.

"I don't know. Do whatever you're doing."

"Well, then, please, be my guest and make yourself comfortable." She smiled and the watched as a little frame of the girl sat by her side.

"So, what are you doing?" The girl asked.

"Nothing, really."

"You come to a park to do nothing?" The girl giggled.

"Essentially, yes."

"Were you taking some time to think?"

"Yes. How do you know?"

"My mommy does that outside the house sometimes."

"Right."

"What were you thinking about?"

"Humm." She eyed the girl suspiciously.

"You can tell me. I don't have friends, so it's not like I'm gonna tell anyone."

"How old are you?"

The girl looked down again.

"What's wrong?"

"Can I tell you how old I am in a week?"

"Why?" Santana had to hold back the laugh.

"Cos… I can't really say the word right. I'm waiting till next week to start saying my age again."

"And how old will you be next week?"

"Four."

"So you're three now. And you can't say the 'three'?" She shook her head. "Can I tell you a secret?" She nodded and looked back to Santana. "When I was three I couldn't say three either, so I walked around and when people asked how old I was, I just showed them three fingers to say I was three." Santana told the girl the story her mother had told her so many times.

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"Did it work?"

"Yes, for quite some time. So, until next week, you put up 3 fingers to say your age. Deal?"

"Deal!" She beamed. "Now, will you tell me what were you thinking?"

"Alright. So, I have this friend and she's the best and I really like her. She's like my best friend. But I did something that upset her and then, she did the same to me and now I'm upset with her and she's upset with me."

"But, isn't she your best friend?" Santana nodded. "How come you're upset at each other? Aren't you 'supposter' to be the best for her and she would be the same for you?"

"Supposed. You mean, supposed. Yes. But sometimes, people do things without thinking and it hurts other people."

"Is it what you did? You weren't thinking and you hurt her?"

"Sort of."

"And she did the same?"

"Not exactly. She did something to hurt me on purpose."

"Ohh Way to go, huh friend?!" She said like she was giving a speech to 'the friend' and Santana giggled.

"Is she a nice person?"

"The nicest of them all!" Santana smiled again.

"Then, she'll apologize. Maybe she is sorry now."

"Yeah… Maybe."

"Will you accept her apology if she do so?"

"I don't know… I'm still mad at her."

"But you have to, cos she's your best friend and Mommy says that when someone apologizes to us, we have to accept their apology, cos it means they're really sorry."

"Apparently, your Mommy is a very wise woman."

"What does wise means?"

"It means she's very smart."

"Oh that she is. Very smart."

"Sweetheart. I've been looking for you all around!" A voice called for the girl by Santana's side and both, Santana and the girl stood up.

"I'm sorry Mommy. I was just talking to my friend."

"Honey… You can't bother people like this." The tall blonde woman picked the little girl from the ground. "I am so sorry miss?"

"Lopez. Santana Lopez." She reached her hand for the woman. "And it's ok. She was a good company. Cute child this peanut right here."

"Thank you so much." She said as another woman walked their way.

"Mama!" The girl beamed.

"Hi baby girl." The woman greeted the child.

"Well, I'm Lauren Bennet-Cooper" Said the blonde woman. "And this is my wife, Camilla Bennet-Cooper."

"Nice to meet you two ma'am." She reached her hand for the smaller woman to shake.

"Mama… Sanny said she'll be my friend while I wait for my best friend to arrive. She won't be my playmate though, cos she says she's too big." The girl cut off the greetings.

"Sanny?" The woman asked with a raised eyebrow. "Already?"

"Well, her name is Santana." She said shyly.

"It's ok. Sanny it is, right peanut?"

"Yeah!" She high fived Santana.

"Well, thank you Santana, for making our girl smile. You must be incredible for her to like you this much already. Hope to find you here more times." Said Lauren.

"Sure thing, Ma'am."

"Now, I'm sorry, but we have to get going." Said Camilla. "Honey, say good bye to Santana here. Ok?" She puts the girl on the floor and Santana kneels down on the girl's level.

"Good bye Sanny! I hope to see you again."

"You will, peanut."

"Promise?"

"I promise!"

The girl wrapped her arms around Santana's neck and Santana hugged her back even thought there was still some uncomfortable feelings coming from Santana in the matter of hugging. After all, she was, according to one Finn Hudson, the 'bitchiest' of them all. Bitches don't hug people, right?

Well, but again, bitches don't usually like kids either, since she's doomed already, might as well make the girl feel good. She hugged back and hugged tightly.

The girl pulled away and Santana got up to watch as the girl held the hands of both her mom's and the three of them started to walk away.

"Good bye, Santana." Both woman said.

"Bye." They walked a few steps before Santana remembered, she never caught the little girl's name, really. "Hey, peanut?"

"Yeah?" The girl looked back.

"I never got your name."

"Ohh, I forgot. It's Brittany." She said and continued to walk away.

Santana was taken aback for that. She expected any names, just not this one.

The girl was blonde, had blue eyes, had this cute smile that was absolutely contagious and her name was Brittany.

She could've sworn she was dreaming if the little girl's hug wasn't so vivid and warm on her body.

She started to walk herself back home when she remembered what the little Brittany had said. "Then, she'll apologize. Maybe, she's sorry now." Those words played on her mind for a few times until she felt her heart beating faster as she realized her phone was ringing again. She took it out of her pocket and sighed relieved that it wasn't Brittany.

"Hi, Q."

"What are you? Dead? Why didn't you show up today?"

"I had some stuff to work on with my mom."

"Well, is everything ok?"

"It will be, Q. Thanks for asking."

"Well, Brittany and I were worried sick. Couldn't you at least text us?"

"Sorry, I had major things in mind. I gotta go now. I'll have lunch with my mom. I'm pretty sure she'll kill me, cos I'm late, but anyway. Bye Quinn."

"Ok. Bye San."

Santana walked into the house and saw her mother sitting on the couch with a magazine.

"I'm so sorry mami. I met this girl at the park and we started talking and when I realized, it was already 1pm. I'm really sorry."

"Just go wash your hands very quickly and get back here to have lunch. I'm starving."

"Ok." Santana did as she was told and soon, got back and sat at the table with Maribel.

"So, who was the girl you met at the park? Does she go to your school too?"

"I don't think she even attends to school, Mami."

"What?" Maribel asked scared.

"She's three Mami. It's a little girl. She'll be four in a week. I met her and we started to talk and she was a very smart kid."

"Oh… Dios mio, Santana. For one second, I thought you had met some college girl or some delinquent girl who was trying to take some kind of advantage of you or trying to sell you drugs. Jeez."

"Relax, Mami." She giggled.

Lunch went fine with small talks all around.

After lunch, Santana stayed to help clean the kitchen with Maribel and the conversation went serious again.

"So, Mami. I know what I did was wrong and I get now that I should've tell you, but how long am I grounded for?"

"A month, if you are a good girl."

"And if I am not?"

"Don't push it, Santana." She warned.

"I'm kidding Mami. I'll be a good girl."

"Good."

"How about the cheerios? Did you make some kind of deal with Sue?"

"No."

"How long?"

"The rest of the semester, she said."

"And you say…?"

"Never again."

"Mami, you can't do that."

"I can and I am doing this, Santana. Before you were a cheerleader, you were just a cute little girl who was absolutely terrified about the first kiss. You were my little girl. After you made it, look what happened."

"I made a mistake. You were supposed to accept my apology and forgive me for this, Mami."

"And I did. I forgave you for this, but it doesn't mean that I'll look past it so soon."

"Mami."

"Santana, let's not discuss this right now. You're disturbing me and making me angry. Next year, I'll think about it IF you are the best girl this year."

"Next year? Mami!" She whined.

"Next year or never. Your choice." Santana didn't respond, she just sighed defeated. "That's what I thought."

Silence fell over them as they were finishing the cleaning. Soon, a knot had formed on Santana's throat. She knew she would have to tell her mother about her other secret. But how would she tell her if she wasn't even sure of it yet.

"Mami?" She started.

"Yeah?"

"I have something that I know I need to tell you, but I can't bring myself to it. Will you be mad if I take a few weeks to gather my thoughts and then come up with a way of telling you? I mean I kept one secret and look where I am right now. I don't want any more secrets and I don't want you to think I broke my last promise, cos, that's certainly not what I'm doing. I just can't say it yet. Not even to myself. Is it ok?" She said practically in one breath as tears came to her eyes again. Maribel walked over to her and cupped both her cheeks in her hands and lifted the girl's face so their eyes met. She kissed the girl's forehead and then, both her cheeks as she noticed the tears she was holding fell.

"Corazioncita. Calm down. I get it. I'm not saying that it's ok for you to keep secrets from me, but I'm also not saying your life shall be an open book. We all have things that take some time for us to have strength enough to voice it out loud. So, all I'm saying is that I want you to come to me whenever you're ready. It doesn't have to be immediately. It can take some time, but what matters to me is if you come to me in the end. Ok? You're confused about something and I understand it's hard for you to voice it, so I won't push you into it. But since you know you need to tell me, I can wait for the time when you're ready for it. It's ok." She hugged the girl tightly as she felt the girl shaking slightly.

"Thank you Mami." She mumbled into the woman's chest.

The rest of the day went by normally and as said earlier, Santana had no tv time and went to bed by 9pm, although, she fought a lot to even go to her room at 9pm, and only gave up under the threat of more grounded time.

She laid in bed awake and realized she had no one to talk to, since Brittany and herself were still in feud.

She contemplated calling Quinn, but realized it wouldn't be a good idea, considering she didn't want to tell Quinn why she grounded.

She stayed there staring the ceiling above her and couldn't help but think the couple she met at the park today was somehow a glimpse of what her deepest thoughts was wishing she could have with Brittany. But then, again, she couldn't be falling in love with her best friend.

Especially not with a girl. How would she explain to her Mami she liked a girl? And how would the entire school react when they found out she was attracted to a girl? They would talk behind her back and she didn't want this. She wasn't strong enough. She was confused about what she felt. She wasn't sure if it was love or just a very strong friendship with benefits, as she brought herself to believe in the first place.

But she knew for sure she had never felt this way before.

Santana felt something vibrate under her and remembered her phone was on the bed.

She picked up and saw she had a new text from Brittany.

She contemplated answering the girl, so she opened the text to read it all.

"_San, I'm so sorry about everything that went down between us. Especially for yelling at you. Please, call me if you're not too mad. Xoxo Britt-Britt."_

She was about to answer the girl, but as soon as she typed the girl's name and stopped to think about what to say, she realized she didn't know what to tell her. She didn't even know if she was mad or deeply hurt in response to what Brittany had done. She also realized she hadn't heard the girl's version of the story. Perhaps, she didn't mean to cause all this trouble. Maybe, she was naïve just like herself. Maybe, the pregnancy was a real thing. Thinking of it, she never really got the chance to ask her if she was pregnant or not. When she finally came back to reality, out of her thoughts, she realized that over an hour had passed. She figured Brittany was probably not waiting for her any longer. With that in mind, she closed her eyes and fell into a deep sleep, once again, dreamless, leaving Brittany waiting expectantly at the other end of the conversation. Soon, the blonde figured Santana must have been too mad and therefore, she wouldn't call nor answer it.

Santana slept through the whole night as Brittany kept waking up every half an hour, one of the reasons was Santana, obviously, but also, giving what had happened that afternoon, the secret was becoming unbearable.

She kept having bad dreams about it and couldn't wait until the next morning so she could talk to the only person who knew about her secret. **"God, time stands still when you need it to run."** And that was the last thought that occurred on Brittany's mind before she fell into a deep sleep and felt trapped in yet another nightmare.

Morning came sooner than what Santana would've liked, but yet, she hopped off bed and began her morning routine, only to be reminded that it was no use, since she was no longer on the cheerleader's squad.

Tears came to her eyes as soon as the black box that should be containing her uniform came into sight.

She dressed on a black pair of jeans and a white shirt with a white pair of shoes and grey cardigan leaving her hair hang loosen only with a headband to prevent it from falling all over her face.

She went downstairs and folded her uniform, putting it on the box ready to be returned.

She ate breakfast with her mother in much silence, for what Maribel would've liked, but she knew her daughter was having a hard time with the 'off the squad' part of the grounding.

She drove the girl to school and turned on the radio, tuning it on a station that plays only good old songs. Mostly love songs.

Soon, "Endless love" started to play and memories of that afternoon with Brittany came floating back into Santana's mind. The song was followed by "Can't help falling in love" making it impossible for Santana to hold back the tear that was always at the prowl at this point of the last 48 hours.

Maribel pulled the car over and waited a moment to do any further movement, thinking it could startle the girl who was already sensible over the day that laid ahead. As far as she was concerned, Santana was crying over the fact she would be handing in her uniform, never to pick it back up any time this year. Barely she knew it had so much more involved into those tears.

After a few minutes, she hugged the girl tightly against her chest and was utterly surprised when the girl didn't pull away from her.

To say she was shocked was an understatement, when she realized the girl not only had stayed for the embraced but also had wrapped her arms around Maribel.

Santana cried for about ten minutes until she pulled away, visibly calmer, but still with the same broken heart expression on her face.

Maribel felt a pang on her stomach at that sight and some sort of guilt over the fact that according to her trail of thoughts, she was the one to blame for Santana's pain.

She helped Santana clean up her face and waved the girl good bye as Santana walked towards school.

She walked in and went to Sue's office in rapid pace. She knocked on the door and waited for a sign to come in. As soon as she had it, she walked into the office, holding back the tears as hard as she could, not wanting to show Sue how upset she was for this.

"Your mother said you'd come. You're late though."

"So what that I'm late? It's just an uniform. Take it and that's all." She pushed the box towards Sue and waited for her to grab a hold of it, but it never happened, so she was forced to face the older woman to see what was taking her so long.

"Not so fast, Sandbags. Your mother called and said you kept something really big from her and said she was very upset and disappointed on you-"

"And here you are pointing it out again, like I don't already know this all. No need to reinforce what my mother said. Ok?" She cut in.

"Yeah, but she never really told me what you did to make her so unsettling about this whole cheerios thing. What did you do?"

"None of your business!"

"Sandbags, I can't defend you if you don't tell me what's wrong." Sue said almost like she meant it.

"You mean you can't spread the word if you don't know what's about." She responded firmly. "It's none of your business. I'm already down, no need to kick me. And surely I won't give you any ways of making me feel worse than I already do." She said with finality in her voice. She threw the box over the table and walked away.

A mix of anger and sadness crossing her face making her cheeks feel as hot as ever.

She kept walking in a rapid pace again, aiming to her locker when she turned right to led to the other hallway, she was met with piercing blue eyes looking as tired as never, but as beautiful and deep as ever.

For a moment, she couldn't look away. She missed her. Brittany. She missed looking into her eyes.

She was more than tempted to reach her hands and slide it softly on the girl's cheeks and rub her thumb under her eyes in a useless attempt of easing such a tiredness showing so eloquent in the form of light dark circles under her eyes, but soon, all her thoughts were ripped away by reality and she felt tears burning the back of her eyes again. She was tired of crying and she had sworn to herself she wouldn't cry anymore today, but apparently, the universe had other plans and there she was, once again ready to cry.

She felt her stomach drop to her feet at the events that would follow, only, she couldn't help with it.

"Can we talk?" Brittany asked and Santana realized her eyes were also full of tears threatening to fall as well.

A minute of silence surrounded them while Santana's feeling got all tangled and mixed as she tried to recompose herself and make herself talk to the girl.

Her eyes watered so much she could barely see through the tears.

Deciding it would do her no good at all to be seen crying in the halls, she ran away, leaving Brittany behind with her own set of tears to deal with.

Besides, she had too many feelings inside her. It would do them both no good if she stayed.

So she ran and ran until she couldn't anymore and then she realized she was back on the park in front of the tree she sat the previous day.

She sat down and silently cried once again.

She came to realize she missed the girl and didn't want to be mad at her anymore, so deciding it was time to hear the girl out, she decided to go back to school.

She had lost her first period, so she sat on the benches of the football field and waited for the bell to ring again indicating it was time for the second period.

As soon as the bell rang, she rushed back into the halls and went for her locker, as she approached it, she was met with the unexpected: Quinn.

"Hey Q." No response. "Whe-where's Britt? Why are you picking up her books for her?" She said nervous.

"What do you want Santana?" She answered angrily.

"To talk to her." She said softly not having any more strength to snap at the girl.

"To talk to her? And you're planning on staying to talk this time or are you going to run away and disappear again?" She snapped.

"Look Q, we're friends. You and me, we're friends, but don't push it, ok? I know she must be mad, but so am I. She shouldn't have done what she did and I'm mad. I couldn't deal with all the feelings so I ran to not lash out on her. But that's none of your business. So will you tell me where the hell is she?" She said angrily.

"At the nurse's station."

"What?" Santana half shouted.

"Britt is at the nurse's station."

Santana waited no more as she ran towards the nurse's station.

She doesn't think she has ever felt this scared in her life. What could've possibly happened to Brittany in such a short time? Was she the cause of Brittany's visit to the nurse?

Millions of questions and feelings went by on her mind while she ran the endless way to the nurse's office her heart racing like a horse to win the race. Her throat was dry and her eyes full of tears. She finally reached the door. Hesitant, she knocked on the door before walking in.

"Can I help you?"

"Humm. Yeah… uhh… Brittany, uhh Is she here?"

Time stood still for Santana as she waited for the woman in front of her to answer her question. Never in her life would she think a second could be dragged for so long.

* * *

**That's it. Hope you like it.**

**Credits: **

**Endless love**** by ****Lionel Richie & Dianna Ross**

**Can't help falling in love**** by ****Elvis Presley**

**Thanks for everything and don't forget to tell me how you feel. **


	9. Great Power, Great Responsibility

**So here's another chapter. **

**Sorry about the delay. It's just that so many things happened between last time I posted here and now. **

**Long story, for short: I no longer have a job and I have 4 extra classes to attend to. **

**(Yes Daddy. Thank you for that one! You're awesome! ¬¬')**

**And no, I'm not in high school. They're just classes off my line of career that my dad insisted that I had to have on my résumé.**

**Anyway, my laptop had a problem with English with this chapter, so if you find coach Beiste's name written as 'Coach BEAST' please, don't mind it. The auto corrector sucks, but also helps a lot, so… Just ignore it. Any other mistakes please let me know. **

**Guest: I'm glad then! She will in due time. It's just hard to write about Brittany without spilling her secret. But soon you guys will know the secret (If you don't already find it out with the hint on this chapter) and I'll be able to write her more easily in the story. Her feelings, her fears, everything. I'm developing the story towards it. I promise! Sad panda? Me too. **

**Guest 02: Well, then lose no time… Go ahead and find it out. Have fun! **

**StephaniieC: You too… Lose no time. Go ahead and find out. Have fun! **

**Thank you all for the reviews, PMs (All one of you. Yes thanks for this one single PM that made my night on a very bad one! ****=D), Favorites and follows! Hope you're all enjoying this! **

**No more delays, go ahead and have fun!**

* * *

Brittany had stayed most of the night awake. She couldn't be more tired.

She walked her way to her locker hoping to find Santana there, but had no such luck.

She gathered her books and was walking to find Quinn, but instead, she ran into the girl she was aiming for just minutes before.

Her blue eyes were met with brown ones that never cease to amaze her and warm her heart.

For a moment, she couldn't look away. For a moment she was just lost into those eyes. It had only been 2 days, but she missed the girl dearly.

When Santana's eyes turned into an expression she couldn't quite read, she build up enough courage and broke the silence.

"Can we talk?" Brittany asked as she kept staring into Santana's eyes hoping that she would be brave enough to tell the girl everything she had planned to.

Before an answer came, she noticed Santana's eyes were now full of tears and she knew right there that she had hurt the girl more than she thought so.

Brown eyes turned into a dark shade of confusion and hurt and before Brittany could even register what was going on, Santana had long ran away.

Brittany felt her chest tighten at what had just happened. Never in her life would she have thought Santana would pull such a reaction towards her, but well, she had hurt the girl. It was kind of understandable that she didn't want to talk.

Still, it was so shocking to her.

Unable to breathe, Brittany felt her knees going weak and giving up.

She felt her chest tighten even more as she gasped for air, but it seemed to never come and when it did, it didn't seem to be enough as she felt breathless still.

She kept gasping an air that didn't fill her lungs and not long after, she felt her head spinning.

An uncountable number of faces was now staring at her, she didn't seemed to care though.

She was looking for one particular face. She searched in vain for one specific pair of eyes that never came to sight. She knew she wasn't there. Santana. She wasn't there, but deep inside, she had wished the girl would burst through the crowd and rescue her and make it all better. Half of her heart knew that those brown eyes would never meet hers while the other half kept hoping they would.

Soon, she couldn't tell one person from another as she was now being engulfed by some sort of darkness.

She knew that feeling. She had been there before. She knew this darkness like the back of her hand, and although, most of the times, she did wished she would just black out and be lost into nothingness, this was not the case.

She didn't want to black out now. It was coming again and she knew it, but she wanted to fight it and stay awake. She was scared she would black out and never wake up again. Scared she would never be able to see those eyes again. Scared that if she closed her eyes, she would be trapped into the same old nightmare that kept her awake for so many nights. Scared that if she closed her eyes long enough, her mind would prank her and take her to the one place she had been avoiding for so long now. 'Silly fears', her mind kept telling her while her emotions kept freaking out.

She wanted to keep her eyes open, but that was a task that proven to be harder than it seemed in that moment. Her eyelids became heavier than ever and she realized she was half way lost into her mind already, until she felt a pair of strong arms wrapping around her and lifting her off the ground.

For a moment she thought it was Santana. She had wished it was.

Her body became much more awake and aware of the surroundings and her breathe improved a little just by that thought, that's the kind of power Santana held on her. She would feel better just by the mere presence of the girl. Instantly. Until she opened her eyes to see that it was coach Beiste instead.

Coach Beiste's voice echoed through Brittany's ears letting her know that wish for someone to be there is almost never enough for them to actually be there.

"Brittany, you're ok sweetheart. You're going to be alright. It's ok. I've got you. Just try and match your breathing with mine. Just breathe ok? Just breathe." Coach Beiste instructed the girl hoping she would calm down enough to make it to the nurse's station.

She walked fast towards the nurse and placed her on one of the gurneys in the room.

"What happened?" The nurse asked Coach Beiste.

"I- I don't know. I was passing by and noticed there was a small crowd near the lockers. I was scared it was a fight, so I broke through, and when I got there, she was having trouble breathing. She was turning blue."

"Does she have asthma?"

"I don't know."

The nurse looked at the girl on the bed. Brittany's eyes were wide with fear and confusion.

"Brittany? Can you hear me? Please nod if you understand what I'm saying." She nodded. "Do you have asthma?" She shook her head. "Ok. Good. I think you had some kind of panic attack. I'm gonna call your parents and let them know. I'll tell them to come pick you up."

"Wait… My- my parents?" She said almost as a whisper and the nurse nodded. "No. I'm ok. I'm alright. See? I'm not blue anymore." She said as she tried to get up and off the bed. "I can- I can go to class now."

"Calm down honey. You turned blue in the hallway just a minute ago and you're telling me you're already ok?" Coach Beiste asked.

"Yes."

"You're still breathless though."

"I'll be alright. It will go away in just a minute."

She tried to put her feet on the ground.

"Brittany, you turned blue from lack of oxygen. This is serious. I can't just let you walk away."

"Please? I'm ok."

"Sit down, let me hear the sounds of your breathing." She did as she was told. "Well, no wheezes. I think you just had a panic attack. Did something happen?" Brittany looked down. "You don't wanna tell me. It's alright. But I'll keep you here until the next period. I'll write you a note for you to hand your parents and I'll have Ms. Pillsbury calling your house to make sure they know what happened." She nodded in agreement. "Now lie back down and get some rest until next period comes, alright?" She nodded again.

She was left alone in the slightly dark room. Her mind wondered back to the situation. It had been so long since she had one of those. The last she remembers was when she got back from her summer camp before freshman year and she realized she had lost her phone.

She would have to tell her parents about it. Even the thought of telling them she nearly blacked out on the hallways of school made her nervous. Her mother would freak out.

After a while, she finally found some silence into her mind. She closed her eyes for a second and soon, she was back to that place. The one she had been avoiding but was constant in her dreams.

"_You better open this door before I get too mad."_

"_But you're already mad."_

"_You don't want to make me madder then, do you?"_

_She shook her head even though she couldn't be seen through the door. _

"_OPEN THIS FUCKING DOOR RIGHT NOW!" Another pound on the door and the lock gave out. It swung open before she could prevent it. "I told you. Didn't I? Where are you? WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?" Angry yells kept floating all around the room while she was hidden under the bed. "Where are you sweetheart? Come out already, will you?" The voice went down to something just above a whisper, like it was trying to trick her into believing sweetness would ever come her way from there, she refused to believe it though. _

"Brittany? Where you? Are you in here?"

_The voice was getting closer to her and when it did finally reached under the bed, she almost stopped breathing. She had been found. _

Her heart and mind kept racing until she opened her eyes and was met with Santana's brown ones.

"Santana." She whispered and threw herself from under the gurney into the awaiting arms of her best friend.

"I'm here. It's alright. I've got you. I'm here." She hugged the girl tight and tried to sooth her with her words.

"Please, don't ever leave me again. Please. I need you. Please…" She sobbed.

"I'm not going anywhere Britt. I'm here. I'll never leave you again. I'm so sorry I ran. But I'm here now. I'll never leave you again. Ok?" Brittany nodded. "Come on let's just sit down right there on that couch. Ok?" She guided the girl towards it and sat down first pulling the girl into her lap. "It's alright. You're alright." Brittany instantly hides her face on the crook of Santana's neck and Santana kept her tight grip on the girl with one hand while the other draw small circles on her lower back.

They stayed there for about ten minutes until Brittany's cries died down to sniffles.

"Do you want to tell me what happened?" Santana asked in a hushed voice as it felt that anything louder than a whisper would bring the end of the world towards them.

"I – I had… It was a bad dream." She sniffed without taking her head off Santana's neck.

"What about? Feel like telling me?"

"The summer, before freshman year."

"Ok." Santana responded confused as to what exactly the girl meant by that. She decided it was best not to push Brittany though.

"Santana, I'm sorry."

"About?" She asked confused.

"Everything. I was mad at you and my mom was still mad at me and I made a mistake. I told her about the boys from the football team. I'm so sorry. Will you forgive me?"

"Did you do it on purpose?"

"No. My mom started to ask a lot of questions and I got confused and when I realized, I had slipped part of the secret already. I told her the rest of it, otherwise, she would picture the worst scenarios and she would tell your mom anyway, so I told her the rest of it."

"So it was an accident?" She nodded. "Ok. Then I forgive you." She smiled.

"Thank you."

"What about you? Will you forgive me for the mess about the pregnancy?" At the question, Brittany raised her head slightly.

"About that, I'm sorry that I was so mad at you for talking to your mom. I know you didn't do it on the purpose of hurting me. And I totally forgive you anyway." She smiled too and noticed Santana was deep in thoughts. "And NO. I am not pregnant, if that's what you're wondering now. " Santana giggled.

"No. That was not what I was thinking at all. I was wondering what happened. Why are you here with the nurse Britt?"

"After you left, I felt like I couldn't breathe. I was about to pass out, when coach Beist found me. The nurse thinks it's a panic attack."

"God… Then it is my fault."

"No." Santana looked down. "No. Santana, look at me." She put two fingers under her chin and lift it so their eyes met. "It was not your fault ok? You needed time and I cornered you. I'm sorry about that. It's just that seeing you leave like that made me realize that I screwed up royally and I didn't know if you would ever come back to me to let me fix the mess I made. That's all. But it's not your fault."

"Britt… I am so sorry about everything. We used to be so easy around each other and now it feels like every time we're around each other, the world comes crushing down on us. I – I just want…" She trails off.

"What?" Brittany asked interest on what Santana had to say after all.

"I just want us to be ok again. You know? I want us to be giddy and carefree again. I want to see your smile all day long again. I want to look into your eyes and see just a beautiful, mind-blowing and breathtaking shade of baby blue as a color."

"And isn't that what you're looking at right now?" She whispers almost afraid to hear the answer. She's scared that Santana will be able to read right through her eyes what's actually going on.

"I wish so, but no. Right now, it seems like there's a cloud on your eyes and they have this different color. I can't quite put my finger on what's that about, but if I had to guess, I'd say it has something to do with this secret you've been holding."

"And we're back to the secret." Brittany sighs.

"Yes, Britt. We're back to the secret. I tho-I thought this wouldn't change you. I thought it- it wouldn't change us." She whispers the 'us' feeling like that word is as fragile as a fancy crystal wine glass. "I thought we would be fine. You would be fine, but instead, I see that this is getting in our way."

"I thought you promised to let me have my space and come to you when I was ready." Brittany said as tears formed in her eyes again.

"And I am keeping that promise. I'm just reminding you that I'm here. I want to see you ok again."

"I'm fine Santana. I promise you."

"Your eyes tell otherwise."

"They'll change their minds. You'll see. They'll be happy again in no time. I just need to look into your eyes for a little while longer and I'll be fine. You do know that right? You do know you have that power over me, right? To make me feel better even without saying anything?" The look on Brittany's face changed from clouded to loving and caring full of hope.

"I just wish that power was bigger."

"With great power comes great responsibility. You know?"

"Quoting spider man, Britt? Seriously?" She tried to seem outraged but failed miserably and laughed at the girl's quote.

"Don't even. You've watched it too you closeted geek." She puts her head back on the crook of Santana's neck while taking a deep breath unconsciously trying to memorize the smell of Santana. As if she would ever forget it anyway.

"And you prove that how?" She asked amused.

"Just the fact that you know where the phrase came from is proof enough."

"Hmm, not really. It's a very famous phrase Britt."

"Yeah, but you're not really denying that you did watch the movie."

"Touché!" She giggles and so does Brittany causing her heart to nearly stop when she finally hears that little sparkle of true happiness escaping through that fit of giggles.

They stayed there for a little while longer until the first bell rang indicating that the first period was over.

Brittany was about to get up from Santana's lap. She definitely didn't need the nurse to call her parents. She had to show the nurse she was fine to go to class. Only that Santana held her down.

Brown eyes met with confused blue ones and once again, their eyes said everything.

Silently told Brittany that Santana was there for her coming what may.

Silently told Santana that Brittany would be just fine despite what it seemed.

Santana started to close the gap between them and Brittany met her halfway there. Their lips pressed together in a sign that they were fine. None of them tried to deepen the kiss. They just stayed there enjoying the feeling of each other's soft lips. Soon they parted and Santana rested their foreheads against one another. Her thumb drawing small circles on Brittany's cheek as they held each other's gaze.

"I wouldn't mind at all, you know?" Santana whispered.

"What?" Brittany asked confused.

"The great responsibility that would come with the power of making you feel better no matter what. I wouldn't mind at all. I would love that power and whatever came with it, wouldn't bother me at all."

"Even if it was like batman? I mean if that meant that you'd have to leave your warm bed to come to my house in the middle of the cold night just to cuddle me and make me feel better?"

"Especially if it meant that!" She smirked. "I wouldn't mind that power at all, seriously."

"But you already have that power silly." They both giggled. "I love you Santana."

"I love you too Britt." They share another fit pecks on the lips. "Now seriously… Are you feeling alright? To go to class, I mean?" She nods. "Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Ok. Let's go then. We're gonna be late."

* * *

**A/N**

**On the part where Brittany is having the nightmare (italic words) there is a small phrase that is there but it isn't part of the nightmare anymore. This one ("Brittany? Where you? Are you in here?"). When this sentence is said, Brittany is half awake and half asleep. But this phrase is said when Santana walks into the room looking for Brittany. Ok? (Don't really know how to express the idea! I'm a confused person. I know!)**

**So that was it. Hope you liked.**

**Don't forget to tell me how you feel and please, if you did found out what Brittany's secret is, don't be shy: TELL ME! (But do it on my PM inbox kay? Let's not spoiler other people's fun!)**

**See y'all next time.**


	10. Free Falling to the bottom

**Ok. So, my mood sucked last chapter and I can't help but think that it got to you guys too. No reviews at all? Uh... Ok.**

**So, here's another chapter. Sorry about the delay, but I already said the reason last chapter. **

**Those freaking classes are just killing me. **

**I really hope you enjoy this one and please, forgive me for any mistakes. This is now the biggest chapter so far. (Yeah, they've been bigger and bigger, I noticed too.)**

**I had problems with the auto corrector again, so, please, let me know if you see any mistakes. Can't say the word in discussion to not spoil things for you guys. (And now, I'm rambling. Sorry!)**

**Thanks for the new followers.**

**Now, with no more delays, go ahead and have fun!**

* * *

The girls walked down the hallways with their pinkies linked like always. Only this time, one thing was different: Santana was no longer on the cheerios squad.

She couldn't help but notice the looks falling all over her.

Soon enough, the confidence she always showed started to drop on free falling to the ground. It would take her a while to get used to this: She was no longer on top of the social pyramid.

Santana walked into class and sat, for the first time, in the back row of the room, trying to avoid people's looks.

"San, why are we sitting back here and not in our usual spot?"

"Nothing. I just didn't want to sit there today."

"Something wrong?"

"No."

Brittany turned to face forward as Santana kept glancing all around the room. People were still staring at her like they had nothing else to do. She couldn't help the anger rising in her chest as she noticed people whispering about her. She knew it could only be about her. She looked down trying to block them all out of her sight. It was over. She was no longer the HBIC.

"Are you sure you're ok?" Brittany whispered.

"Yes Britt. I'm fine, don't worry."

"You look like somebody just kicked your puppy."

"It's 'killed' Britt."

"What?"

"Never mind Britt-Britt. Don't worry I'm ok."

"I got it, Silly. When somebody kicks your puppy, it makes you angry. When somebody kills your puppy, it makes you sad. So it's 'killed' to mean you look sad. I was just trying to lighten the mood. Apparently, I failed miserably."

"You didn't. I'm ok. There's no mood to be lighten. I'm fine." She smiled.

"Right. What happened to your cheerios uniform?"

"My mom grounded me." She looked down again.

"For how long?"

"The rest of sophomore year." She replied sadly.

"What? Santana, I'm so, so sorry. I never meant for something like this to happen. I'm really sorry."

"It's alright Britt. I should have told her but I decided not to. It's not your fault."

"I should have kept my mouth shut, but I didn't. I'm so sorry."

"It's ok. Don't worry."

"GIRLS!" The teacher shouted. "I have no idea what's going on back there, but I would love to be included. Want to share with the class what you're talking about?" Silence from the girls gave the woman her answer. "I didn't think so. Silence please." She finished.

The rest of the classes went on normally, except that people seemed to not fear to stare at Santana anymore. It felt like they knew, somehow, what went down between her and the whole cheerios thing.

She rested her head on the table as the bell rang, indicating it was lunch time.

"Aren't you coming for lunch?" Brittany asked.

"I'll meet you there in a minute. Go on."

Brittany turned around and left the room leaving Santana to her own thoughts.

"**What the hell am I gonna do now?**

**I can't have this people thinking they can look at me like that.**

**Who the hell do they think they are? I'm Santana fucking Lopez. No one looks me up and down like that. **

**But then again, I deserved. **

**It doesn't mean it sucks any less though."**

Her thoughts were interrupted by someone walking into the room.

Santana looked up to see Quinn walking in.

"Starving yourself much?" Quinn asked. "Britt said you would be here."

"I'm just thinking!" She said lowering her head again.

"About what?"

"What do you think Fabray?"

"Is this about the cheerios thing?"

"Obviously."

"Let me tell you this: Being part of the Cheerios squad is something extremely overestimated."

"Says the head of the squad in question." Santana snapped.

"No. Says your friend. I'm just trying to help, you know?"

"It won't be the same Q. Being here and not being a cheerio. I'll have to quit Glee or else, I'll be slushied daily." She said angrily.

"If I were you, I wouldn't do that. You're already off the team, and let's face it Santana, you are not a particularly nice person. You don't have many friends. You quit glee club and you'll have no one. You know I can't protect you against Sue and neither can Brittany. Stick to those guys."

"It's not like they're going to protect me either." She said angrily shooting her head back up and crossing her arms in front of her chest.

"True. They probably won't protect you either considering they can't even protect themselves, but at least, you'll have them as support."

"No I won't. I'm not really a nice person to them either." She whispered the last part.

"Then, start changing that cos you'll need them more than ever."

"What about you? And- And Brittany?" She said weakly as tears came crushing through her voice.

"You'll always have me and Brittany, but you know, the more friends through this, the better." Quinn stood up and walked to the door. "Now get up and come have lunch with me and Britt."

"What about the others? I'm not on the squad anymore."

"So? Brittany and I will never look at you any different because of it. Being a cheerio or not, you're still friends with us. Now come on." She smiled and waved the girl over.

Santana smiled back and got up to have lunch with her friends. It went almost normal.

"So, Santana, I heard Sue kicked you out. What happened? Your sandbags weren't good enough anymore?" Sage laughed.

"Shut the hell up if you don't want to meet the bottom of the pyramid again." Quinn snapped.

"What? You're sticking up for losers now, Fabray? Isn't that stupid club of yours charity enough?" Sage replied.

"Glee club is not stupid." Brittany shouted. "And Santana is not a loser. We all have problems at one point or another. At least she's facing hers. Contrary to you that keeps walking around pretending like you're not about to fail this year." She finished leaving everyone in the room stunned. It's just not part of the girl to behave like this. It's odd. But feels nice, Santana thinks.

"So are you." She shouted angrily. "We all know how stu-" Sage never got to finish her sentence as one single slap was delivered directly to her face.

"You might talk about me as much as you want. I don't fucking care. But try and let me catch you calling Britt stupid and I'll sure cause you some big damage to your face! Now you call your dogs over before I regret letting you go." Santana said oddly calm as the four girls glared at her and walked away.

"Santana, you didn't have to do that." Brittany says.

"Yes, she did Brittany. And hadn't she done it, I would." Quinn said breathing heavily.

"That would get you kicked out of the squad Quinn."

"And who the hell cares? Not me for sure. I like being a cheerleader Brittany, but my friends comes first and having someone calling you stupid is way over the line. I'd get kicked out happily for slapping that bitch!" She says already turning to look at Santana. "Are you ok?"

"It has started. I told you so. It only tends to go south from here." Santana replied looking down.

"Santana, you put those bitches in their places in no time. Keep up with that attitude and you're going to be just fine."

"No. I won't and you know it Q. Wishing hard isn't enough, you know?" She walked away from the girls rapidly and went towards the auditorium.

Santana sat with her legs hanging from the front of the stage. Desperately trying to keep her tears at bay, she breathed in and out searching for some kind of control that was nowhere to be found inside her.

She wanted to scream and hit everyone and yell a big fat "fuck you" to everyone that crossed her path, but again, she had trouble enough on her plate as it was. No need to add some more. She had to control herself and find a way to live with what happened without becoming such an easy target.** "Easier said than done." **She thought.

Of all things her mother could've done, damn, she went for the hardcore. Santana off the cheerios was like a fish out of water: Out of place and dead in no time.

"Don't frown too much, you're gonna get permanent lines in your face."

"Get lost."

"I saw what happened at the cafeteria."

"And you came to hear the details to spread the word, right? Leave me alone Lady face."

"You know Santana, sometimes people only want to help. I came to see if you're ok. You're gonna need us now that you're off the squad. We can't protect you from them but we can sure support you." Kurt said calmly.

"I don't need anyone. Now go away." She snapped angrily.

"Ok. But hear me when I say you're gonna need us. Life sucks enough with friends. You don't want to be alone to face this. Believe me. We're here if you need us."

"Yeah, right." She scoffs.

Kurt walked away leaving Santana alone behind him.

The tiniest bit of control that she had found had just been shattered. Barely had Kurt left and Santana's tears ran wide and free down her face.

While Santana was at the auditorium, Brittany and Quinn stayed at the cafeteria.

"Quinn, I really think I should've gone after her."

"Give her some space. You know her. She needs to process this whole thing before she can be friendly to anyone. She needs some time alone to gather her thoughts and put them in order. She'll come to you when she's ready. Don't worry."

"Yeah but I made the mess. I should fix it. Instead, I stood still while she risked a suspension to defend me. Q, I should protect her and not cause more trouble. I should be there just in case she needs me"

"Jeez. What are you? Her girlfriend?" Quinn asked and Brittany froze. "Just give her some time, she'll come around. Santana is just like me, she processes things better when she's alone. She's fine. She will come around soon." She completed, but Brittany was no longer listening.

"**God. Maybe she knows something. Oh my! She knows!**

**Santana is going to kill me. I let it slip. **

**These secret lives sucks. I hate secrets. I just do. **

**What am I going to do now that Quinn found out? Santana will leave me for sure. Damn!"**

"Hey, Brittany… Earth to Brittany" She snapped her fingers trying to get attention from the girl.

"I-I'm... I'm not her girlfriend. I'm just her… I'm her friend who happens to be a girl. B-But I'm not her gir-girlfriend. Not at all. That's not the case." Brittany stuttered out nervously.

"Calm down duckling!" Quinn giggles. "Of everything that I said that's all you heard? It's alright. I'm just saying Santana is fine. Calm down."

"I think I should tell her, Quinn."

"Why? Because you're guilty over this mess?"

"No. Because I think she deserves to know." Brittany whispered.

"Well, honestly, I think it could be a good thing to tell her. It would save us so much sneaking. But it's your life. You must decide who should and who shouldn't know. But do it only when you're ready. " She replied.

"I know. And I think she should know."

"Then, what's keeping you from telling her?"

"I'm scared. Her eyes Quinn. What if it changes the look on her eyes?"

"I don't think it will, Brittany. But you won't know until you try."

"I know, but I can't risk that. If this stupid thing change her, I don't think I'll survive to tell how it ends. She's what keeps me going, you know. I don't think I can live through one more day if she decides to not love me anymore."

"WHAT?" Quinn shouted surprised.

Had she heard it right? 'LOVE'. How come she missed all the signs for this? No. It can't be. Are her two best friends in love with one another? She can't believe it. At the same time, feels good to know they have each other. They need someone to be there and Quinn knows, that in front of what she's going through herself, she can't be that 'someone' to either one of them. Best it is if the girls are there for each other, instead.

"Nothing. I gotta go." Brittany said quickly getting up and running off the cafeteria. She found Santana on her way to her locker.

"Are you ok?" Brittany asked.

"Yes."

"You look like you were crying though."

"That's because I was, Britt." She smiled weakly.

"Why?"

"cos I'm angry."

"With me?"

"Never." She looked deep into blue eyes saying silently how much she meant it. "Never." She repeated.

"What are you angry at then?"

"Everything. This thing is so fucked up. I just…" She sighs. "I don't know, Britt. I'm just angry. But never at you though." She offered a smile again. "What about you? You look flushed. Are you ok? You're not going to faint or something, right?" Her eyes grew bigger at the thought.

"Calm down, San. I'm ok. But, I need to tell you something. I don't think you'll like it, but I need to tell you." The bell rang.

"What is it?"

"After classes. We gotta go now." She said simply and offered Santana the biggest smile. "Come on. We don't want to be late."

Class went pretty normal for both girls, except that Santana still felt like sitting in the back of class was the best option. The whispers went on forever, but at least, no one was looking at her and Mrs. Callbi was there to ensure no one looked back or she would kick whoever did out of her class. Everyone had to face forward. For the first time, Santana was glad for that rule and so was Brittany.

Classes were over and soon it was time for Glee club.

Santana was still mad at them for not sticking up for her even though Brittany and she had made out already. But fair was fair. Stick to who's right, right? But again, Glee club was still the best part of her day. Now more than ever.

Brittany had the last period with Quinn, which means she would meet Santana in the choir room instead of walking to it by her side.

Santana walked alone down the empty hallways that led to the choir room. She was lost in thoughts until she noticed footsteps. Looking back, she saw that Sage was back and had a few of the cheerios with her again.

"Came back for more, Sage kid? There's a lot more from where that one came from." Santana said.

"Your fists won't defend you against everything Santana. Especially not against this." Sage replied and before Santana could process, 8 cups of ice and red dye number seven were emptied upon her face. It was official. Santana Lopez had being slushied for the first time in her life.

Time stood still as the icky and cold solution dripped from her hair and her face all the way to her clothes, underwear and shoes.

She froze, and not from the slush. Her heart broke and tears burned the back of her eyes begging for release. She wouldn't let them fall though. Not in the middle of the hallway, at least.

She watched stunned as the girls left laughing and high-fiving each other for what they had just done. She couldn't help but think that she had done this a million times, and never had she thought about how the person on the other end of the act felt over this. She never got herself on the shoes of someone being slushied by her. Never until now.

She closed her eyes, noticing now that the burn in them weren't just from tears. The damn slush burned as hell too.

She snapped herself out of her trance and went to the bathroom, where finally, her tears came full force and found freedom on their way down her face.

She tried to take off as much of the thing off of her hair and clothes, but it was too late. It was stuck in her clothes already. Burnt as proof that she was now at the bottom of McKinley's social pyramid.

She tried to brace herself for the rest of the year, but failed miserably and cried harder at the thought of this happening on a daily basis for five more months.

Over 15 minutes later, she had got herself under control and got out of the bathroom. She contemplated going home, but figured that she would have to face the Glee club sooner or later. **"Might as well do it already**." She thought.

She walked in the choir room and instantly, all eyes fell on her. She felt like she was naked in front of a crowd.

Mr. Shue wasn't there yet. She kicked herself internally. She should've waited until Mr. Shue was there. That would grant her the silence she desperately needed.

Taking in her appearance, everyone's eyes grew wider as they realized what happened. Santana's hair was dripping wet. Her white shirt and grey cardigan were no longer so clean and bright. They showed signs of being washed, but the unmistakable red of a big fat slushie was still there.

"Santana, what happened?" Tina asked.

"Isn't it obvious, Asian number one?" She snapped.

"Who did this to you?" Finn asked.

"It doesn't matter. Mind your own business Frankenteen."

"Guys, you're all missing the big question here." All eyes turned to Puck. "Santana, were you naked in the bathroom while you washed your shirt?" He smirked.

"Shut it, Puckerman." Quinn snapped.

"Where the hell is your cheerios uniform, Santana?" Mercedes asked.

"Guys, just leave her alone, alright?" Brittany said. "Come sit down Santana."

"Finally." Rachel muttered.

"What did you just said?" Quinn asked.

"What? I'm not going to pretend I feel sorry for her when I don't. I'm happy that someone finally did to her what she did to all of us. She got what was coming!" Rachel snapped angrily.

Santana looked up from her lap to Rachel. She tried to put on her brave face and glare at the girl, but not to her surprise, she failed again. Her face showed nothing but hurt and sadness.

She got up just in time as Mr. Shue walked in clapping his hands as always.

"Alright guys, I have an assignment that will…" He cut himself off as he noticed Santana's clothes as she stood on the back row. "Santana, are you ok? Who slushied you?"

"**There."** Santana thought. **"It's real now. He said it out loud. No more running from the truth. I've been slushied."**

"Never mind her Mr. Shue. She won't talk politely to you either. I have an idea for today's rehearsal though." Rachel said not really looking back at Santana.

For not looking back at her, Rachel missed the tears that ran quickly down Santana's face as she wiped them angrily with the back of her hand. She grabbed her bag under her chair and ran towards the door not looking back. Only then, she reached Rachel's sight and a pang of guilty stabbed Rachel's stomach.

"**No. I am not going to feel sorry for her. I've been in those shoes long enough. It was about time for her to be on my shoes." **

Rachel thought as she brushed off the guilty that hit her at the sight of Santana leaving. She didn't have to look at her face to know she was crying, yet, she didn't want to feel sorry. Santana was mean, according to her and the whole school. She deserved it.

"Guys, what happened to her?" Mr. Shue asked stunned.

"You couldn't keep your mouth shut, could you?" Brittany said. "You couldn't just keep your thought down, could you? She's hurt. She had a hard day and she was looking forward to be here, only to come here and have you talking to her like that, right Rachel? She looked forward to come here only to have you all looking at her like that and shooting her with all your questions. In moments like this, I swear I'm ashamed of being part of this club." She finished angry and got up to go after Santana.

Soon, Quinn was gathering her papers to leave as well.

"What? You're leaving too Quinn? Why don't we all just get up to go after Santana? Wake up Quinn! She has been slushied on the hallway. We all have. She won't die you know?!" Rachel snapped.

"She was right, you know? Brittany. She was right. We all talk about being family here and having each other's backs, but that's just a load of crap." Quinn said oddly calm.

"Quinn, that's not true. It's just that-" Mr. Shue was cut off mid-sentence by a very angry Quinn now.

"It's just what Mr. Shue? It's just that she's Santana? So what? She's one of us, you know?" She yelled. "This is ridiculous. She put on all her bravery and showed up here wearing the only proof that she had been slushied only to have you all acting like that's no big deal."

"Because it's not Quinn!" Artie shouted angrily.

"She could've just gone home. But she didn't. She washed her clothes and came here. She wanted to be here. She was hoping for support and all that she got was hostility and hate." She shouted back. "You better pray that Santana is not out cos if she is, so am I." She walked past Mr. Shue towards the end but stopped and turned around, staring deep into Mr. Shue's eyes. "I expected more of you Mr. Shue." She said before she went out the door.

She walked out of school and found Brittany and Santana sitting in the steps of the stairs outside she stopped for a moment as she realized that they were talking about something else then the slushie thing.

"So much for being a family on Glee club." Santana scoffed. "Now, help me out here. Take my mind off this mess. Will you please-" Santana was cut mid-sentence by Quinn.

"Kiss her already?" Quinn asked playfully completing Santana's sentence.

"What? Shut it Fabray." She glared at the girl. "Mind your own business, you know nothing."

"I know more than you think." She giggled and sat down by Santana's side.

"So, Brittany." She said deciding to ignore the Quinn. "I was going to ask, before I was rudely interrupted by this girl right here, what was it that you wanted to tell me?" Quinn laughed.

"I can only imagine." She said earning a glare from Santana.

"I was going to tell you that… uh…"

"She was going to tell you that I know the dirty little secret that lies warmly between the two of you." She said calmly not facing either girl and smiling softly.

"WHAT?" Santana's eyes grew wider.

"That's what I was going to tell you."

"Jeez. I need to knock off all my secrets. They don't work for me anymore. Britt, no one was supposed to know." She wined.

"I didn't tell her. I was talking about something else and she caught it."

"What were you talking about to let it slip into it?"

"I don't even remember." She said and exchanged a glance with Quinn making sure Quinn knew better than to tell Santana what they were talking about.

"Fabray, if you ever-" She turned to Quinn on her left side.

"I won't tell anyone. Don't worry." She smiled softly. "Do you need a ride home? Where's your car?"

"No, thanks. I already called my mom. And I'm grounded, I don't have my car for the next few weeks."

"After all, what happened? I'm floating here."

"If you tell anyone, I'll kill you."

"I won't. I swear."

"Now that you already know, might as well fill you in. Britt and I had a problem with a sore boob." Quinn froze. She knew that secret. Santana was way too close. "And we ended up having a disagreement about it and I talked to my mom cos I was worried that something was wrong with her. Turns out, my mom turned into Tina, the gossip herself, and called her mom explaining our talking and telling Mrs. Pierce that Britt could be pregnant. Mrs. Pierce later on interrogated Britt and she slipped to her mom that we both had had sex with some guys. My mom got mad cos I didn't tell her and grounded me. No car, curfew at 5pm sharp, bed time at 9pm, no tv time, and last but not least, no cheerios squad for the rest of the year."

"Jeez. She went hard on you. And I thought my mom was rough."

"Believe me Q. Judy Fabray is a kitten compared to an angry/hurt Maribel Lopez." The three of them laughed and after that, a comfortable silence fell over them.

"So, Santana, does that mean you and Britt are like… Dating?" Quinn smirked.

"Quinn!" Brittany shouted and slapped the girl from behind Santana.

"What? It's a valid question!" She laughed. "Are you two in love now? Should I leave the two lovers alone now? Am I third wheel?" Quinn asked giggling and earned glares from the other two girls. "Ok. I'll stop." She put her hands up in surrender. "But seriously. What are we facing here? Are you two dating now?"

Santana froze. She hadn't talked to Brittany about this yet. She hadn't even discussed this with herself, let alone having an answer.

Brittany's eyes fell over her and even though she tried to hide, Santana saw a little spark of hope in there.

Hope that Santana would say 'yes, we are.' or something like that. She owed the girl an answer, but she didn't have it yet. She opened her mouth to say something and nothing came out.

"We-" She was about to say but a honk broke her moment and she looked away to the car waiting for her. "I gotta go. See you girls tomorrow. And thanks for everything." She got up and ran towards the car hopping into the passenger's seat.

"What was that about?" Quinn asked.

"It's just complicated Quinn." Brittany answered sadly as she heard the honk of her mother's car. "I gotta go. That's my ride."

Santana sat in her mother's car facing her lap as her mother stared at her.

After a moment, Maribel realized Santana wasn't going to start this conversation, so she did.

"What happened Mi hija?" She asked and by the end of her sentence, Santana broke down crying and threw herself into Maribel's arms. She was unconsciously looking for the love and support she was expecting to find on Glee club earlier. "Shhh… It's alright. You're alright, cariño." She hugged the girl in her arms tightly against her chest, silently letting her know that no matter what happen, she would be alright.

"It has started." Santana mumbled after a moment into Maribel's chest.

"What have started, Corazioncita?"

"My free falling to the bottom of the social pyramid."

"What?"

"I got slushied today, Mami." She got up from Maribel's embrace and looked down at her own shirt painted in a faded red dye. "It's gonna be hell for the rest of the semester." She cried out again.

"If you want me, I can go and talk to your principal and make sure you get treated right, corazión."

"It will only make it worse, Mami."

"What can I do for you then?" Maribel asked broken.

"Let's just go home. I'll be fine." She wiped her tears as Maribel drove off.

The ride home was silent, except for Santana's sniffs every now and then.

Maribel couldn't help but think that the brokenness she heard on her daughter's voice was no one's fault but hers. She was deep in thought until a loud sob echoed on the car. Perhaps, she had gone too far.

Santana was sad and broken. Not only for being slushied, but for the lack of support from the group she thought were her friends. She would never admit it out loud, but she liked them and had in them all some kind of confidence, which got shattered today with the hostility they all showed towards her.

"**Family my ass!"** She thought. **"No one gives a damn about me. I'm bitch, but that's just who I am. If they were family, they should take me for who I am. What about all that crap about true colors? Yeah, right." **She scoffed.

Maribel pulled over in her garage and silently, Santana got off the car and inside the house, immediately going up to her bedroom.

She laid down on her stomach and sobbed for all the events from today. So much for feeling good.

Maribel was on the kitchen, but even from there, she was able to hear Santana's sobs. It wasn't possible that she was crying that hard over a cheerleader squad. Not possible.

She walked her way upstairs and knocked on the door of her daughter's room before entering.

"Mi hija?"

"I want to be alone, Mami."

"Talk to me, please." She pleaded.

"You already know." Santana replied.

"I'm one hundred per cent sure this is not only because of the cheerios and a slushie. There's something more into those sobs. Tell me." This time she was met with silence. "I can't help you if I don't know what it is. Talk to me." She sat on the bed and rested her back on the headboard.

"Glee club." She sobbed again as she put her head on Maribel's lap now.

"What about it? I thought you liked there." Maribel combed her hands through Santana's hair.

"And I do. It's just… Never mind Mami. I'm overreacting. I had it coming. It's alright."

"Coracionzita, tell me what happened."

"I got slushied today by a few of the girls on the cheerios, when I was walking down the hall to the choir room. I went to the bathroom and cleaned myself and wiped as much of that thing out of my hair as possible. When I got out, I was going to call you, but, I remembered a conversation I had with Quinn earlier today and I thought… I thought I could count on them." She said sadly.

"The Glee club."

"Yes. So I walked in and instead of support, they shoot me down with questions and the satisfied smiled was plastered on most of their faces. So I got out. I thought they would be on my side because I'm one of them too, but I was wrong. I was wrong Mami. They're not my friends and obviously, I'm not one of them. I think I'll never be."

"I get it, Mi hija. It's alright to be upset. They should've supported you instead of being hostile to you."

"Still, granting me the right to be upset doesn't make this suck any less. I hate this all. They always talk about us being family and yet, when it comes to me, there is no family, just a bunch of people waiting for the first chance to laugh and make fun of me." She let out a sob.

"I know babe. It doesn't make you feel better. But they're wrong and they'll come around and apologize to you."

"Don't be so sure, Mami. They hate me."

"No. They don't."

"What makes you so sure of it? They do, Mami. I know."

"You are amazing and a hardcore friend, babe. You're loyal and truthful. That's what makes me so sure. Just give it some time, honey. You'll see, they'll come around."

"I won't hold my breath, that's for sure."

Silence fell over them as Maribel kept combing her hands through Santana's hair.

"If I were you, I'd shower already, before this thing dries out and get stuck to you hair even more." She spoke again and Santana sat down on the bed. "I love you Mi hija. Don't ever forget that."

"I love you too, Mami." She said as she hugged Maribel and went off to shower right after.

The water from the shower was hot and Santana felt a great relieve from that. She had not realized how cold she was until now.

"**Congratulations, Santana. You went from second HBIC to something slightly worse than Jacob Ben Israel."** She thought.

"**Now, about Brittany, what the hell are you going to do? She was waiting for an answer. You're such a dumbass. How come you got stuck with that answer? She must be so hurt right now. Damn. How come my day sucked so badly today, huh? Jeez. To be even worse, all that was missing was… No. Not even gonna think about it." **She huffed. **"Long day."**

She shook her head and got off the shower. She dried herself and got dressed and went to lay down on the bed again, closing her eyes, she fell asleep. This time, not a dreamless sleep. She dreamed of herself and Brittany. In her dreams, she was out and proud but whenever she was awake, she would feel so confused about it all. But nonetheless, **"BEST DREAMS EVER!"**

* * *

**That was it. Again: Sorry about the long wait. Hope my not so great mood didn't get stuck in your heads again. **

**Don't forget to tell me how you feel.**

**See y'all soon. **


	11. Where we stand

**Hello everybody!**

**Please don't kill me! **

**I know I took forever to post this one and I'm really sorry, but I got stuck on it and couldn't move forward. I wrote an end for this chapter, but found it boring and erased it. I put some parts of Maribel in here, but then found it extremely 'filler' and erased again and after the millionth time of writing/erasing, I settle for this.**

**Hope you can all forgive me for such a long wait and can enjoy this. **

**Tishamay****: hahaha Not yet. Poor Santana, I know... Believe me, broke my heart too. Thank you!**

**Guest****: Can't tell what the secret is but you'll soon start to figure it out. Right? Queen of Lima Heights! She's upset right now, but she'll come to terms with it. I promise! Thank you!**

**Roxy lu: ****Thank you! Yes, Quinn knows! Yes, you'll find out more about how Quinn knows about the secret, but I guess not SO soon. One more chapter until then, I guess! Please, tell me what your ideas are. You could do it on my PM inbox here or find me on twitter ( Mayah_Enchanted) or on tumblr ( .com ) I'd be super happy to read about it! Thanks. Update, here you go.**

**StephaniieC****: We're getting there! Jeez, I think I'm more anxious to tell the secret than you guys are to find out about it. hahaha Santana and secrets doesn't work along.. BUSTED! Update, here you go. Thank you!**

**FC****: We're getting there! Ohh, You're worrying now? Wait till I post some more of this. hahaha But I don't want to spoil anything... Keep going. Thank you. Update, here you go.**

**There's a better note by the end of the chapter and explains why this took me so long. **

**Thank you guys very much for the reviews and new follows/favorites! It made me really happy!**

**Now, no more delays go ahead and have fun!**

* * *

"Hi, Mom." Brittany said as she entered the car.

"Hi." Linda replied. "So, Brittany, Ms. Pillsbury called." Linda said not really looking at her daughter.

"Wh-What did she said?" She stuttered nervously.

"Nothing, really. She said that you weren't feeling well today, but still, insisted on staying. What happened?" Linda replied.

"It was just a headache, mom. Quinn had an aspirin in her locker, I took it and went to class. I'm fine." Brittany said relieved that Ms. Pillsbury hadn't said anything about the real situation.

"You should've called. You know how I feel about you feeling unwell at school and not telling me. I thought we had a deal." Linda said.

"But I'm telling you, mom. It was just a headache."

"I thought we had a deal about that too."

"About what? Headaches?"

"Don't play that on me, honey. Lying. I thought we had a deal about 'no lies allowed' in this family." Brittany looked down. "Now tell me what really happened!"

"I just had some trouble breathing. That's all."

"Honey, you don't have asthma or anything like it. What happened in there?"

"The nurse said it was something like a panic attack." She whispered.

"WHAT?" Linda shouted. "You had a panic attack and refused to call me?" She said.

"I didn't call you exactly because of how you're reacting right now mom. I didn't want to deal with that in the morning."

"Brittany, that's serious."

"No. It's not. I'm fine mom. Can we just drop it?"

"Drop it? Brittany, do you have any idea of how serious this is? What caused it?"

"I don't know, mom."

"How? You had a panic attack and you don't know what caused it?"

"No, mom. I don't. I just- I don't know. I felt out of breath and next thing I know, the football coach carried me to the nurse. But I was feeling just fine by the time I reached there."

"I'll be discussing this with your father."

"Course you will." She mumbled.

"What was that?" Linda asked.

"Nothing." She sighed

The ride home had been silent after that. Except for her own heartbeat racing blood through her veins and making loud pumping noise on her ears, Brittany couldn't hear anything else.

Not long after that, her mind drifted right back to Santana.

Quinn had shoved them both out of the bubble that was their relationship. "_Are you guys dating now_?" The question echoed through her mind.

"**There's no turning back now. Something changed and now I need to know. Damn. I need to know where we're standing now. I need to know where Santana is standing. **

**Crap. Isn't it enough? With all the problems life has thrown on me, isn't it enough? Now I have to worry about weather Santana loves me or not? I'm really screwed now. **

**Why did she hesitate when Quinn asked? I mean, we didn't talk about it yet, but, really? That hard to answer? **

**Perhaps she's not into you as you are into her, dumbass!"**

Her mind was racing with her last trail of thoughts.

"**Has it never occurred to you before? That Santana might not be in this for the long run? Maybe she's just looking for fun. **

**Damn it. Is Santana taking me as just 'fun'? Oh my God. That's horrible. No she wouldn't do that to me. Or she would tell me, right? And besides, she said she loves me that afternoon at my house. **

**Yes. Hold on tight to that. She said "I love you". Hold on to that.**

**Oh, snap out of it, Brittany! Like you would be able to give her any kind of stable relationship. You haven't even told her yet."** She scoffed. **"That freaking secret is going to ruin everything. "**

"Brittany?" Linda called her daughter.

"What?"

"I've been calling you for the past ten minutes. What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I was, uh… Thinking."

"Well, then, go 'think' in your room. We're home." She said as she got out of the car.

Brittany followed suit and walked behind Linda towards the house, aiming straight for her bedroom.

She closed the door behind her as soon as she walked in on her bedroom. She knew what was coming, yet, there was no way she could possibly brace herself for it. Dinner at the Pierce's home was not going to be pleasant according to her expectations.

Everything was ready for dinner when Stephen Pierce got home from work and slammed the door shut.

"Honey, I'm home." He shouted as he sat on the couch.

"Hi" Linda said walking in on the living room. "How was work today?"

"Same." He said as he pulled her down on his lap kissing her softly. "How was your day?"

"Good. It was good." She wrapped her arms around his neck. "I need to discuss something with you though."

"Sure, but can it wait till after dinner? I'm kinda starving."

"I think it's for the best if I tell you already. We need to do something about it, sooner rather than later."

He sighed. "What is it?"

"Brittany… Uh… She had another panic attack today. They're getting more frequent and I don't know what to do Steph."

"I told you. We should get her to counseling."

"I know, but she doesn't want to. It's hard to make her do things she doesn't want to do. She won't talk if she's forced to be there. You know that."

"I know. I know, honey." He rubbed her back. "But we'll have to. Something is wrong with her and we know it. We need to make sure she has support for whatever is going on."

"I know, but how? She hardly remembers the attacks. Normally she thinks she fainted or something. But this time, she knows it. She remembers it, honey. I have no idea what to tell her."

"How about you tell her nothing? She needs therapy not a pep talk." He said sternly.

"I'm sorry, Steph, but you know she's not going to make the counseling decision any easier for us to take. She doesn't want to go."

"We give the final word in this house, Linda, not her. She will go to counseling if we say so. Was I clear?" He half shouted at her.

"Like water." She mumbled.

"We'll talk more about this after dinner." He said sternly and took a deep breath calming himself down. "Is dinner ready yet, honey?"

"Sure. I'll put it on the table. Come on." Linda walked back into the kitchen with Stephen following close behind. "I'll call Brittany." She walked out of the kitchen and got back not long after with Brittany following close behind.

Brittany's heart was racing as she waited for the subject to come back. She wasn't surprised at all when it came back sooner than it should.

"Brittany, I need you to tell me, what happened at school today and what set you off?" Stephen asked.

"According to the nurse, I had a panic attack, but I told mom already, I don't know what set me off."

"You can't possibly be serious right now. You can't have a panic attack and not know what set it off, Brittany!"

"Apparently, I did. I'm fine now, though."

"You're fine? You look like you haven't slept for 4 days and you tell me 'I'm fine now, though.'? You can't be serious! You need help!" He shouted the last part making both women jump a little.

"I don't. I don't need help. I just need- I just…" She couldn't finish what she wanted to say cos that would piss her dad off for sure. What she needed was Santana. What she needed was for all the mess in her life to just disappear, but that wouldn't happen, would it?

"What honey? What do you need then?" Linda asked in the verge of tears.

"I need to be alone. Can I be excused?" She answered as soon as she got her own tears at bay.

"No. Not yet." Stephen said. "I'm done with postponing this. We need to talk this through and do what needs to be done in the end." He said as he grabbed a hold of Brittany's wrist, sending shivers up and down her spine.

"Let her go, Steph. She won't talk to us right now, she's angry. Let her go. I'll talk to her tomorrow morning."

"No. It's time for her to talk to us, Linda. We're her parents. She needs to tell us what's going on. Brittany what happened at school today?" He pulled her close to him and glared at her enough for her to understand he was serious.

"Nothing." She answered on a low voice.

"Why did you panic?"

"I don't know." She hung her head. She couldn't tell him it was for Santana. He wouldn't like to hear it.

"Then why didn't you call us? You could've died!"

"I- I didn't-" She started saying in a barely audible tone.

"Speak up!" He shouted and she jumped.

"I didn't want to worry you over nothing."

"Nothing? You could've died. Of course we're worried about you." Stephen said defeated.

"You don't have to. It was no big deal. I'm fine. I promise."

"Go to your room Brittany. I need to cool down and then we'll talk some more and get you some help."

He let her go and she almost ran to bedroom, but reminded that she wasn't supposed to run in the house.

She walked to her room and closed the door behind her and sat down on the bed. Slowly, she reached for the phone on her night stand and texted Quinn.

"_One more night!"_

The text reached its destination leaving Quinn aware of she had to do the next day according to what the next text would be.

Hours went by and no text came for Quinn leaving her on the verge of flipping.

Brittany sat on the bed waiting for a talk that never came. Before she drifted back to sleep, she texted Quinn again.

"_Nothing yet. Maybe before the sun comes out. Thanks Q. See you tomorrow." _

"_Hope not. See ya, Britt."_ Quinn replied seconds later.

Both girls drifted to sleep, although, Brittany didn't go far on sleeping. She'd wake up every now and then, considering how anxious she was.

When the morning came, she got ready for school and called Quinn.

"Hey, Britt! What's up?"

"Hi, Quinn… I was uh… Can you pick me up? I kinda don't want to take a ride with my mom."

"Sure. I'm just leaving home now. Are you ready yet?"

"Yeah."

"Good, I'll pick you up soon."

"Thanks Q."

"You're welcome!"

Quinn arrives at the house and Brittany is waiting outside. The girl gets in the car and instantly, Quinn knows she's on the edge of bursting into tears.

"What's wrong?" She asks when Brittany doesn't say anything.

"Everything, Quinn. Everything." She sighs.

"I know, but other than that?"

"I'm tired. Other than everything wrong. I'm tired. I'm tired of hiding this from Santana. I'm tired of keeping this at bay. I'm tired of even bearing this secret, Quinn. Sometimes I feel like I might just explode. You know that feeling you get when your heart is about to overflow? That's where I'm standing right now." She says as a few tears streams down her face. "Now let's get going otherwise my mom will notice your car still parked. Come on."

Quinn started to drive them to school.

"Are you gonna tell her today?" Quinn asked as she pulled over on the parking lot.

"I'm thinking about it."

"Ok."Silence fell over them for a second until Quinn asked the question that had been driving her insane all night. "So nothing happened?"

"No. Just a talk over dinner about how I should've called home and they wanted to know what set me off."

"Did you tell them? What set you off, I mean." She asked carefully.

"Of course not Quinn. How am I supposed to tell them I freaked out because I thought the girl I am in love with was leaving me? I didn't. She's a girl. The person I'm in love with is a girl. I don't think they'd be thrilled to know about it."

"At some point, you'll have to tell them, you know?"

"With all that goes on in my life? No, thanks. I'll tell them when I'm eighteen and out the door for wherever I'm going after school."

"Brittany, we're sophomores. There's still over a year for us to be able to leave here."

"Quinn, I've been hiding this for a long time. What's a little over a year compared to all the years since I was 13 to now?"

"I mean it's too long to hide Santana, Britt. I meant Santana, not your secret. AT some point, she'll slip something or you will and you'll both be screwed. You more than her, actually. Or maybe not. Her mother has a thing for secrets, or something, she'd be as screwed as you would."

"I know the risks but we'll be fine."

"How do you know?"

"Because so far, I've hidden this from everyone and no one found out. There were so many years that I loved her and didn't act on it and then, there's this time we've been together and

nobody knew it, not even you. What's a year of keeping this low compared to all this that we've already done?"

"You're right. Just be careful then."

"We always are."

They got out of the car and met Santana in the school building.

"Good morning, girls!" Santana said.

"Good morning, Santana." Quinn responded. "Not wanting to sound rude, but I gotta go."

"Alright." Santana answered.

"Good morning, San. How are you doing?"

"Good. Why?"

"Just asking." She shrugged.

"I'm fine. Thanks." She answered. "How are you doing?"

"I'm fine too." She smiled. "So, about glee club…"

"I'm not sure yet. I'm really mad, but I don't know…"

"You know, I'm mad too. For how they treated you, you know?"

"You don't have to be, though. It's alright. They were right, you know?"

"No, they were not."

"I was a bitch to them all, Britt. They're right. I'm mad cos they choose the worst time ever to show their real feelings towards me, but after all, they're right."

"No. They are not right. You were mean to them, but you always had their backs and you put yourself on their side even against the cheerios and Sue. You are amazing and they should have supported you like you did to all of them. Ok? Don't sell yourself short, San. You are the most amazing person I know."

"Thanks, Britt. I love you." She said as her eyes filled with tears.

"I love you too."

They linked their pinkies like they always did and walked to class.

"You know, whatever you decide, I'll support you."

"I know. Thank you." Santana said.

As she turned the right on the hallway to go to classroom, the unexpected that should have been expected happened.

Another slushie was thrown.

Santana felt the ice cold blue beverage start to run down her face and soak her shirt and bra.

Right then, feeling the slushie following its course according to gravity and soaking everything in the way, all Santana could feel was tears burning the back of her eyes and a cold empty space in her hand. **"Where did Brittany's soft and warm hand go?"** She thought.

The cheerios and the some guys from football team that had been there to 'present' Santana with a round of 14 cups of slushies high-fived each other complimenting each other for the good job on soaking the girl completely into the blue of it all. They started to walk away, until Sage stopped and looked at Brittany.

"Better watch out, Pierce. This time we shoved you out of the way. Stick to this loser and next time you'll get a round of it along with her." She smirked and they all walked away leaving Santana stunned in the middle of the hallway and Brittany pressed in shock against the wall.

Santana's loud sob was what snapped Brittany out of her trance.

"Are you…" She trailed off. Asking if she was ok would be stupid, Brittany thought. Obviously, she's not. "Come with me, I'll help you clean yourself." She walked to the bathroom pulling Santana along.

She pulled a chair for Santana to sit down near the sink but with her back turned to it.

Gently, Brittany started to wash her hair and silently, tears fell out of Santana's eyes.

She dried it as best as she could with some paper towels.

"Take your shirt out. I'll wash it for you." Brittany said softly.

"It's alright, Britt. I'll call my mom and ask to bring me a set of clothes. Even my underwear is soaked and not in the good way." She laughed but also released a short sob.

"Still, I don't want you to freeze to death as you wait for her to arrive." She said calmly. "Take it off. I'll wash it for you." Santana hesitated for a second. "You can go into the stall, you know? If you want to cover yourself."

"It's not about that, Britt. You know it." She hung her head.

"Then, what is it?" Brittany asked. "What's going on?"

"Britt, we… we haven't talked about… You know… uh…"

"About where we're standing in this… I don't know relationship?" She said softly.

"Yes." She said lowly.

"Well, then, let's talk about it. I-I've been dying to know too."

"Where do we begin?"

"Tell me what you think and what you want."

"I've told you this before, but, right now it seems to be so much harder to say it, but I love you. And a few years ago I realized that I'm angry all the time because I have this feelings for you that I can't quite control or understand, but I wanted to try it on and so we started doing whatever we were doing so far. At first, kissing you was enough for me. It gave me some kind of peace that I didn't even know I missed until you showed me what it was like when my mind was silent. After a while, I started to fight myself because I needed more than just that but at the same time, I was scared and I didn't want to need more than just kissing you, but I did. I needed you more and no matter how I tried to fight it, it just got stronger and stronger so I gave in and we went further than just kissing and I love it that we did, Britt, but now, I have all those feelings again, and unconsciously, I tried to fight it, but again, it was no use, I need more. I want you more than to just fool around and pretend it's nothing. I want to stop lying to my Mom. I want… I-_ uh…" She sighed. "I think I want more than that now. I think you deserve more than that. I want to know where we stand, Britt."

By the time Santana finished her speech, Brittany was crying silently.

She had waited for so long for that moment to arrive and for that kind of true love to come along. He dreams was definitely coming true. But why did it taste so bittersweet then? Why was she crying? Why couldn't she just accept what Santana had just said and be happy? She knew why, but it felt like her heart refused to believe she would be forever tied up to this secret and all that came along. She wouldn't. She couldn't. She wouldn't let it happen. She needed Santana just as much as Santana needed her. She had to be honest though. She needed to let Santana know where she truly stood, even if where she stood was nowhere near to where she really wanted to stand. Gathering all her thoughts and getting her tears under control, she breathed heavily and spoke again.

"Santana, I love you too. More than you'll probably ever know, but right now, I can't be open and proud with this. I'm really sorry, but that's where I stand right now. I hope to not lose for this, but secretly making out and securely hiding in the closet, that's where we stand."

Santana burst into tears and before she could process what was going on, she felt a strong pair of arms wrapping around her. She wanted to fight it, she did. The girl had just broke her heart with those words, yet, the tiniest contact with that skin sent shivers all over her body and almost instantly, she felt herself relaxing into that embrace as she sobbed her heart out.

The way Brittany told her where they stood hurt as hell, but she wouldn't let the girl go so easily. She loved her. She would fight for it till the end of times. She just needed a reasonable explanation to what just happened and they would be fine. She knew it.

Santana wanted to be out and proud while Brittany wanted to hide, if possible, even further into the closet. That's where they stood.

* * *

**That was it you guys. Again, I'm really sorry for the longest wait ever in this story. But I got stuck with this chapter. Sorry about that. **

**Can I tell you guys a secret of my own? None of the past 6 chapters (including this one) was written in the original plan for this fanfic. I mean, not all of it, but some parts of it (most of it, ok.) wasn't on the original plan and I decided to put it out here like last minute of each post. (Yes, that's one of the reasons why it took so long to post.) **

**On the original plan, I didn't discuss much of Santana's punishment and reactions to it or what happened when she was pulled out of the cheerios and we all know slushies would be unavoidable in this case, right? **

**I also didn't talk much about how Brittany felt carrying all this around and I thought it wasn't fair to only talk about her as 'the one carrying a secret.' I wanted you guys to know she lives pretty much around the secret, but the secret is not really who she is and she's getting tired of it. **

**And what took me so long? Talking about Brittany is always hard for me cos there's not much I can use with her without compromising the secret, but it's also hard cos there's so many feelings and so much emotion that I want to explore with her, but I'm still working on Santana. I need Santana to be in better terms with herself so I can start to talk about Brittany, cos believe me, Brittany will need a lot of support from Santana for this and this support can only be provided if Santana is feeling good inside and out.**

**WARNING: It's a pretty heavy secret. Brace yourself from now on. We're getting close. **

**About the next chapter, it won't take so long now cos I'm back upon track for the original plan and I don't have to change much. So, if everything goes ok tomorrow, Saturday I can type it and post it on Sunday! Cross your fingers!**

**Thank you all for being so patient with me and for sticking around for this. I'm really glad.**

**Let me know how you feel.**


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